Wedding rings...

[JDonhardt]

I'm getting married in October. While looking around at wedding bands I'm told hers will be roughly $2,000. I feel like this is pretty absurd, but I've never been married before. And we only looked at a single place today. Just wondering if there are any married people here that would like to share their opinion on how much a wedding ring should cost. Should I expect a $2,000 price tag everywhere I go?

I know weddings are really important to women and all, and I dont want to be a d.ck or anything...but $2,000 for the band? Really?

 

[LPMan59]

i had my wife's entire set custom made by the in-house jeweler at Distinctive Diamonds. Cost me $1000 for her band (the engagement ring cost much more). my band was custom made there as well to match for $1k. I highly suggest talking to Julie or Eli (the owner). I won't buy jewelry anywhere else.

edit: ours are in 14k gold. platinum is much more expensive.

 

[Eddie]

I won't ever say my wife and I are the "average" sort of people, but we felt the same way you do. We bought cheap rings for the ceremony but we don't even wear them nowadays. She wanted to spend the money on a good honeymoon and that is how we spent it. We kind of have a saying when people ask us about rings. I tell them "she knows who she's married to" and she says "he knows who he's married to".

What I think you ought to do is sit her down and talk to her openly and honestly about it. If a $2,000 ring would make her happy, buy it, if she feels differently though, spend your money on her some other way.

 

[Scutter01]

The idea that a man should spend two to three months' personal wages for an engagement ring originated from De Beers marketing materials in the early 20th century, in an effort to increase the sale of diamonds.

The trouble with engagement rings. - By Meghan O'Rourke - Slate Magazine

You've been duped by the De Beers marketing machine. Save your money. Buy a cubic zirconia or a semi-precious gem, and don't start your marriage off by contributing to diamond slavery. I never understood the whole concept of blowing your life savings on a ring right when you need the money the most. You could be using that money to put a down-payment on a new house or to getting yourself out of debt.

 

[LPMan59]

Save your money. Buy a cubic zirconia or a semi-precious gem, and don't start your marriage off by contributing to diamond slavery. I never understood the whole concept of blowing your life savings on a ring right when you need the money the most.

he's talking about the band.....

and i bet its pretty rare for women to accept a cubic zirconia engagement ring. sounds good in theory.....

 

[JDonhardt]

Save your money. Buy a cubic zirconia or a semi-precious gem, and don't start your marriage off by contributing to diamond slavery. I never understood the whole concept of blowing your life savings on a ring right when you need the money the most. You could be using that money to put a down-payment on a new house or to getting yourself out of debt.

Agreed. But its not even the diamond. Its the plain ol' wedding band. We've lived together for 5 years, all of our money goes into one bank account, we're renovating a house, paying for the wedding ourselves...we're doing this together, I'm just baffled that the wedding band would be this much. I'm hoping this one place was just trying to bleed us dry and other places will have lower prices. I think the men's band was only $100 or so!

 

[Scutter01]

he's talking about the band.....

and i bet its pretty rare for women to accept a cubic zirconia engagement ring. sounds good in theory.....

Then it's even more absurd. Frankly, if Spasmo had insisted that our marriage or her happiness hinged on some shiny trinket, it would have proven how shallow she was. Fortunately for me, she's not shallow.

When you're first starting out in a marriage, you're usually (although not always) in your early 20's, just starting out. Why would you want to enter into that marriage with both of you flat broke or in hock up to your eyeballs?

 

[MadBomber]

You've been duped by the De Beers marketing machine. Save your money. Buy a cubic zirconia or a semi-precious gem, and don't start your marriage off by contributing to diamond slavery. I never understood the whole concept of blowing your life savings on a ring right when you need the money the most. You could be using that money to put a down-payment on a new house or to getting yourself out of debt.

for Scutter01.
I spent less than $600 total for the engagement ring and the wedding ring set. Paid cash for all of it too. We decided to minimize our debt as one of the principals of our marriage.

 

[The Keymaster]

We bought only the wedding ring for my wife, and she opted against the engagement ring. I do not need a wedding ring. I know I'm married, and I don't really care who else does or does not know. I hate wearing jewelery of any kind. We did get her a really nice wedding at a place in the Western Chicago suburbs called The Jewelery Exchange. We got a really good deal.

 

[Scutter01]

Buy a $100 or $200 ring from Walmart or something, and then, when you're celebrating 10 years together and you have a little savings just sitting there not doing anything, then consider it.

 

[Eddie]

Then it's even more absurd. Frankly, if Spasmo had insisted that our marriage or her happiness hinged on some shiny trinket, it would have proven how shallow she was. Fortunately for me, she's not shallow.

When you're first starting out in a marriage, you're usually (although not always) in your early 20's, just starting out. Why would you want to enter into that marriage with both of you flat broke or in hock up to your eyeballs?

Scutter is talking some wisdom here. If you have dept that is where your money needs to be going. You can buy her a shiny for your five or ten year when the debt is paid off. I never did believe in credit cards so we didn't have the debt thing to worry about but we still didn't waste money on rings. (Mine cost $300 in 1995.)

Just talk it over with her. You might be surprised.

 

[JDonhardt]

Then it's even more absurd. Frankly, if Spasmo had insisted that our marriage or her happiness hinged on some shiny trinket, it would have proven how shallow she was. Fortunately for me, she's not shallow.

When you're first starting out in a marriage, you're usually (although not always) in your early 20's, just starting out. Why would you want to enter into that marriage with both of you flat broke or in hock up to your eyeballs?

for Scutter01.
I spent less than $600 total for the engagement ring and the wedding ring set. Paid cash for all of it too. We decided to minimize our debt as one of the principals of our marriage.

These are examples of rational thinking. Respect.

 

[LPMan59]

Then it's even more absurd. Frankly, if Spasmo had insisted that our marriage or her happiness hinged on some shiny trinket, it would have proven how shallow she was. Fortunately for me, she's not shallow.

When you're first starting out in a marriage, you're usually (although not always) in your early 20's, just starting out. Why would you want to enter into that marriage with both of you flat broke or in hock up to your eyeballs?

a BMW is absurd to those who can only afford a KIA.

ultimately it comes down to what you feel comfortable spending. i certainly didnt spend 3 months salary, but i personally felt the woman i love was worth more than a few hundred dollars spent at the mall. obviously ymmv. i do not fault those who choose to spend that money on other things (ie a house), but i find it somewhat insulting that you think my wife is shallow because she wanted a diamond ring.

perhaps i should join in by making a statement on your (former/current?) socio-economic status?

 

[JetGirl]

Holy....Wow. I think I'm a cheapskate.
/comment

 

[Scutter01]

a BMW is absurd to those who can only afford a KIA.

ultimately it comes down to what you feel comfortable spending. i certainly didnt spend 3 months salary, but i personally felt the woman i love was worth more than a few hundred dollars spent at the mall. obviously ymmv. i do not fault those who choose to spend that money on other things (ie a house), but i find it somewhat insulting that you think my wife is shallow because she wanted a diamond ring.

perhaps i should join in by making a statement on your (former/current?) socio-economic status?

I didn't say your wife was shallow. In fact, I didn't even imply it. I said I would have thought Spasmo was shallow. In fact, I specifically said to spend the money on paying down your debt and wait to buy it until you are farther along in your "savings career" to the point when you CAN afford it. If you can afford a ring at the time you get married and that's what she wants, then I have no problem with it.

What I REALLY have a problem with is De Deers and the way they've got everyone believing their line of crap.

 

[AuntieBellum]

You've been duped by the De Beers marketing machine. Save your money. Buy a cubic zirconia or a semi-precious gem, and don't start your marriage off by contributing to diamond slavery. I never understood the whole concept of blowing your life savings on a ring right when you need the money the most. You could be using that money to put a down-payment on a new house or to getting yourself out of debt.

The diamonds you see in mainstream, reputable retailers are not "blood diamonds." Are there shady dealers selling blood diamonds? Yes. Is DeBeers a hugely profitable marketing machine? Yes. However, jewelry is also an investment. It isn't likely you'll be able to trade it in for food if SHTF, but you can pass down memories and love by passing along quality, heirloom pieces to your loved ones. Don't overspend, so definitely do some price checking, but get something that will last and represent your marriage for the next 50+ years.

With that said, $2000 seems like a lot of money. Even my platinum wedding band (only .25 ct tw, but decent color and clarity) was only $600. You must be getting her some mega diamonds!

Some additional notes:

Check out the warranty. Some stores will screw you over if you're even one day past the inspection period and and/or not help you if you lose a stone. And you shouldn't have to pay for the warranty.

Don't buy into the super-duper-special-weird-new mixtures. They're crap and not worth anything. Stick with the classics, as they've proven to withstand the test of time: 14k, 18k, or platinum. 10k is to brittle (and less than 1/2 pure gold) to withstand normal wear. Fingers move, so the metal should move with the finger when necessary.

Whatever they try and tell you about the 4 c's, something with I clarity will show the flaws (carbon, bubbles, etc) to the naked eye. Just because you don't notice that day, doesn't mean her gazing eye won't see it in a couple months. Then that's all she's see.

Ask for a better price - jewelry stores have room to haggle!

I dunno where you're at...but if you're in the Lafayette area, I can give you a great reference for a jewelry store and hook you up with the management staff. I trust they'll help you out. Even though the company screwed me over in my job after three years, I still only buy from them since they're the best. They have stores in other parts of the state, too. Rogers & Hollands

And congrats on your upcoming marriage!

And sorry if I'm a little long-winded, but I'm pretty passionate about my jewelry!

 

[lovemachine]

I studied rings and such like crazy before I proposed to my wife. Scutter is right, spending a crap load of money on just a ring is stupid. I wanted to use the money to pay down some bills and get some saved for my now current house. I spent $1000 for a diamond ring at Kay's. That was my limit I set myself. I had been saving for a while, and I had sold my Harley Davidson a couple months before. I used the money to pay some bills off, and I used some to buy furniture for our house. And I took the $1000 to buy a ring. Then I proposed. My little brother looked at rings a month ago. He was going to spend $5000 for a ring, one that his girl picked out. Luckily I talked him out of it. Like my dad told me. It's not about the ring or the wedding. Its all about the marriage.

 

[hornadylnl]

I spent $6-700 on both of my wife's rings. If that wasn't good enough for her, she wasn't good enough for me. I never saw the first ring she got me but I think it had some sort of stone in it and I told her to take it back and get me a plain gold band. She got me a comfort fit one and it's plenty good enough for me.

 

[flyinlow78]

If you are anywhere near Indy, listen to the previous poster that recommended that you check out Distinctive Diamonds. I got my wife's rings there. The same engagement set that Shane Co wanted to [STRIKE]rob[/STRIKE]...er, sell me for OVER $8,000, I got at Distinctive, with a BIGGER, HIGHER QUALITY diamond for under $5,000. They were the nicest people, and have provided free inspection and cleaning every time we ask. I could not have been happier. We returned for the wedding band, and also for my ring, and got the same outstanding service. If they don't have what you want, they will order it. Search the internet, find a ring you like, and check their prices.

Shane Co. was absolutely lying to me about so many things, that when I started researching on my own I got sick to my stomach that I was almost duped. I tried every other store too, Jared, Zales, the mall "jewely" stores, and every online store I could find. Do your research and you don't have to go broke to buy the best.

 

[edsinger]

Diamonds are SEMI-precious only.

As for bands, No more than $1400 an ounce for the gold and workmanship...


I no longer wear mine.......hung 30' in air by it, bloody.......