INGO: Joke of the day page

[Ericpwp]

What's a PUTUS?

 

[G-Niner]

Female POTUS.

 

[miguel]

What's a PUTUS?

Female POTUS.

I thought that was a PUTAS?

 

[T.Lex]

I thought that was a PUTAS?

INGO: where a misspelling in a Joke of the Day thread turns into a multilingual joke.

#Gottaloveit

 

[stephen87]

I thought that was a PUTAS?

HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHA, Damn, can't hit Miguel again.

 

[KoD]

Hey...lol. I'm a fan of autocorrect for my fast fingers. Good comebacks though.

 

[KoD]

I think we have a runner.

Now that I'm familiarized with what a runner is...I can respond with, nope. Single mom of 6 kids who likes guns. Bored at home after a week off work with one child post surgery and one post anesthesia for a test. Was browsing away and trying to have adult interaction. If I wanted to use the classifieds I have two viable and immediate options. 1. Pay $20, right? And 2. Tell my boyfriend I want something. As it is, I'm extremely broke and browsing. I did see some fire 3% patches though!! And on a side note, I thought my contribution to joke of the day was On Fleek

 

[jamil]

Now that I'm familiarized with what a runner is...I can respond with, nope. Single mom of 6 kids who likes guns. Bored at home after a week off work with one child post surgery and one post anesthesia for a test. Was browsing away and trying to have adult interaction. If I wanted to use the classifieds I have two viable and immediate options. 1. Pay $20, right? And 2. Tell my boyfriend I want something. As it is, I'm extremely broke and browsing. I did see some fire 3% patches though!! And on a side note, I thought my contribution to joke of the day was On Fleek 珞

6 kids who like guns? Good job.

 

[KoD]

6 kids who like guns? Good job.

Lol, no only 5 do.

 

[jamil]

Lol, no only 5 do.

That seems statistically more likely.

 

[KoD]

That seems statistically more likely.

Yeah. I don't like using sentence structure appropriately. There's still hope for the 6th one though. Her boyfriend is a fan.

 

[Jerchap2]

 

[Jerchap2]

 

[Jerchap2]

 

[Suprtek]

I used this on a long time ago but I've been around here a long time so it might be ready for another go. This story has the advantage of being absolutely true.

During my normal travels doing service calls, I stopped at a stop sign. There was an elderly gentleman at the intersection wanting to walk across in front of me. I waved him across. It was a nice day so the windows in my work van were down. After he crossed, he turned to speak to me. He said "Thank you, I wasn't sure you were going to let me cross." I said "No problem, you're the pedestrian." He then looked a bit confused and almost a bit angry. He then said "No I'm not! I'm a Baptist!!"

 

[stephen87]

Now that I'm familiarized with what a runner is...I can respond with, nope. Single mom of 6 kids who likes guns. Bored at home after a week off work with one child post surgery and one post anesthesia for a test. Was browsing away and trying to have adult interaction. If I wanted to use the classifieds I have two viable and immediate options. 1. Pay $20, right? And 2. Tell my boyfriend I want something. As it is, I'm extremely broke and browsing. I did see some fire 3% patches though!! And on a side note, I thought my contribution to joke of the day was On Fleek 珞

Fire 3% patches?! ****! Why did no one tell me?! Here I am busting my ass on the Indiana colored ones, and there are FIRE ones?

 

[Informed Decision]

This is a true Facebook post by my daughter .


One one of my grandsons (2 1/2) , sneezed & his older brother (6 1/2) told him... "he needed to cover his mouth when he sneezes, or coughs, or belches any time he's in the house." Then he added... " but, you don't have to cover your mouth if your outside , and as a matter of fact, you can even SPIT & PEE if your outside in the grass. Boy, the knowledge these young-uns have now days.

 

[308jake]

That's how I potty trained my son. I asked him if he wanted dirty pee pants like his Grandpa or pee outside like your Daddy. I then showed him the joy that comes with responsible urination off the front porch while all the world basks in your glory. He chose wisely, and the days of diapers were over.

 

[halfmileharry]

A tried and true method

 

[IndyDave1776]

I used this on a long time ago but I've been around here a long time so it might be ready for another go. This story has the advantage of being absolutely true.

During my normal travels doing service calls, I stopped at a stop sign. There was an elderly gentleman at the intersection wanting to walk across in front of me. I waved him across. It was a nice day so the windows in my work van were down. After he crossed, he turned to speak to me. He said "Thank you, I wasn't sure you were going to let me cross." I said "No problem, you're the pedestrian." He then looked a bit confused and almost a bit angry. He then said "No I'm not! I'm a Baptist!!"

A friend of mine had a customer in a Christian book store ask if he could buy a gift certificate. My friend replied, "Yes, what denomination (i.e., $20, $50, etc.) would you like?" The man answered, "Assembly of God".