First time I had to draw my handgun (in this state)

[Sylvain]

You're reading too much into it.

He saw your facepalm and, by welcoming you, made the joke that you must be new if you're still shocked or surprised by how crazy some of our fellow INGO'rs can be.

This!

 

[BiscuitNaBasket]

New site logo design idea:

INGO

 

[Spike_351]

oh, sorry for the misunderstanding then.

I can read just fine. I deliberately quoted that section because the person was NOT in the dwelling, but on the property.

gg

 

[jd4320t]

You're reading too much into it.

He saw your facepalm and, by welcoming you, made the joke that you must be new if you're still shocked or surprised by how crazy some of our fellow INGO'rs can be.

Oh OK thanks.

It does still surprise me and it's sad gun owners think these behaviors are OK.

 

[Dirtebiker]

Assuming he pulled a weapon. You can split hairs all you want. Im sitting here at my home...not in jail. The "law" has already spoken with their "silence". Mercy is exactly what it was. If i felt compelled to shoot I have no doubt that I could prove the history of this guy and that I had a valid reason to foresee the situtation to show it was likely there would be harm to my girlfriend or I BEFORE I even raised my weapon.

So now you're a mind reader!?
His "history" wouldn't save you in court if you would have shot him. Only the facts. What he (and your gf, and you) did beforehand.

 

[k1500]

If it is not a regular occurrence to have people stop by at that time if night, don't open door. Call police. "Talk" to person through the door. Have gun in hand but out of sight.

 

[Dirtebiker]

I do agree that I need to have more in depth talks with the girlfriend about scenarios at 230am. This person was no friend of mine and neither is his x-girlfriend. I have been constantly telling my GF that it is a bad idea to be around his x-girlfriend because of the history and surrounding drama that follows.
I feel I prevented the 230am knocker from even getting the chance to pull a weapon (when i reasonably believed he had his hand on one). One thing I dont understand among this thread is that the first words out of a police officer's mouth when a person has his hands in his pockets or coat is let me see your hands, sometimes while the Officer's gun is drawn and I didnt have enough time to get the police at my house last night because the situation was dramatically turned around not in my favor considering my GF ignorantly went outside (I did not know she intended to do this or I would have stopped her). So I disagree that I screwed up.

You didn't prevent anything. If he wanted to shoot your girlfriend, he had the opportunity before you put your pants on!
If you can't admit, and learn from your own mistakes, there is nothing any of us can say or do to help you.

And I'll ask again, how could you possibly let your gf even get close to the door before you at all, but especially with your ability to "foresee" that he was going to shoot one of you, and your "knowledge of his history"?

 

[Glock19]

<----Elbows down= no gun, DUH!

 

[Dirtebiker]

If it is not a regular occurrence to have people stop by at that time if night, don't open door. Call police. "Talk" to person through the door. Have gun in hand but out of sight.

Keep up, common sense went out the window on the first page.

 

[lovemachine]

I find this a little funny. I just unloaded a few pallets of steel off a semi with the fork lift. Afterwards, I was outside talking to the driver....with one hand in my coat pocket, and the other just hanging.

I am SO glad the driver didn't pull out a gun out at me.

 

[SERparacord]

I find this a little funny. I just unloaded a few pallets of steel off a semi with the fork lift. Afterwards, I was outside talking to the driver....with one hand in my coat pocket, and the other just hanging.

I am SO glad the driver didn't pull out a gun out at me.

You are very lucky, he must have been non-union.

 

[jsharmon7]

OP, let's get right down to it:

This guy is the ex of your girlfriend's friend. So you know him, he is not a stranger lurking in the dark. He knows where you live and since he did date your girlfriend's friend, I have to assume he's been to your home before for social gatherings. So at one point he was invited to your home and allowed to be there, or at least that's my assumption. Unless you've left out this detail, I see no evidence that you've ever told him he's not allowed to come to your home. Even though he is no longer dating your girlfriend's friend, I see no reason why he would feel that he is unwelcome at your home under threat of death. Further, you and your girlfriend went outside to speak to him and apparently did not tell him he wasn't welcome until you pulled your gun on him. I'm not sure I'd call this situation "trespassing."

Your only belief that you were in danger was a series of guesses made without any fact. A hand in the pocket on a cold winter morning is not justification for deadly force. A cocked elbow is not justification for deadly force. A belief that he must be high if he came to your house is not justification for deadly force. Having a history of drug use is not justification for deadly force. Being an illegal immigrant is not justification for deadly force. Any combination of these assumptions is not justification for deadly force.

Your statement that the only reason you didn't shoot him was out of mercy leads me to believe that you felt justified in using deadly force, although you later changed your story on this point. The fact that you weren't arrested for your actions is not proof no crime was committed, only that the police had no victim and the finer details of the story were probably never explained to an actual police officer. The dispatcher gets a general story from you and decides whether it warrants sending an officer. Without a victim and without you asking to speak to someone, it's likely the dispatcher didn't see a point in sending anybody.

Finally, you voluntarily brought this story to INGO and then specifically asked for critiques. It didn't go the way you thought it would go and now you're getting defensive. My best advice is for your to read through this thread again in a couple of days when you've cooled off and try to learn from this. Also, getting some training would be helpful for you too. Nobody here thinks you're a bad guy, just one who made bad decisions on this occasion.

 

[Bunnykid68]

His hand was not in his pocket, it was inside the coat with the other hand not in a pocket or in the coat.

 

[jsharmon7]

His hand was not in his pocket, it was inside the coat with the other hand not in a pocket or in the coat.

My apologies, but it still doesn't matter. He was looking for his ex-girlfriend, maybe he had flowers for her in an attempt at reconciliation. Since we're making lots of assumptions, why not? It's still not a reason to believe your life is in danger.

 

[Bunnykid68]

My apologies, but it still doesn't matter. He was looking for his ex-girlfriend, maybe he had flowers for her in an attempt at reconciliation. Since we're making lots of assumptions, why not? It's still not a reason to believe your life is in danger.

Woman beating druggie bangin on my door at 2:30 in the morning, not sure how I would feel.

But if he had been an officer and walked outside and pointed his gun at him while telling the perp to slowly take his hands out where he can see them everything would be all hunky dory

 

[ajeandy]

The perp knows I do not like him because he is a woman beating pieced of doo doo and he knows he is not welcome around my home. He is also scared to death of me because his girlfriend has relayed that to my girlfriend before.

Captain Bad Ass

 

[jsharmon7]

Woman beating druggie bangin on my door at 2:30 in the morning, not sure how I would feel.

But if he had been an officer and walked outside and pointed his gun at him while telling the perp to slowly take his hands out where he can see them everything would be all hunky dory

You're reaching...

 

[Bunnykid68]

You're reaching...

Yes, but not for my gun. What would an officer have done in that same scenario though?

 

[jsharmon7]

Yes, but not for my gun. What would an officer have done in that same scenario though?

First, what an officer would have done is entirely irrelevant to this situation. Since you're asking though, here is the relevant case law for officers pointing their gun at people:

http://www.patc.com/weeklyarticles/print/7th_pointing_gun.pdf

So can I justify that I was in reasonable danger because someone that I know knocked on my door at 2:30am looking for his ex-girlfriend? We have no proof he was on drugs. We have no proof he had a weapon. We have no proof he was a threat, in fact he was crying over lost love apparently. I guess it would be up to the OP to argue that in court if anything had come of it.

 

[TTravis]

Maybe he was just adjusting himself after seeing your GF standing outside in the cold, fresh from bed, barely dressed.