Scutter01's Inquisition - #10 Animal Thunderdome

[Scutter01]

Who would win in a fight between a rhinoceros and a rhino-sized lobster (or a lobster and a lobster-sized rhinoceros)?

Discuss, citing specific examples.

Optional: Suggest two other animals who you want to see fight and why.

 

[Cwood]

What can beat a purple rhino?

 

[Scutter01]

What can beat a purple rhino?

I'm gonna suggest a rhino-sized lobster.

 

[Cwood]

I'm gonna suggest a rhino-sized lobster.

Do you have a list of attributes that this rhino sized lobster has? Such as max running speed, weight, total body strength, etc.?

 

[Squatch]

For these type of questions/situations, my money is always on the mantis shrimp. They are one of natures greatest killing machines.

Shane

 

[Cwood]

For these type of questions/situations, my money is always on the mantis shrimp. They are one of natures greatest killing machines.

Shane

I understand you reasoning. The question I pose to you is this. Have you ever encountered a purple rhino? If so, what were the circumstances, were you in its natural habitat or was it in yours, what was the final outcome of your encounter?

 

[Benny]

Without a doubt the lobster. Those pinchers would be devastating and think about how strong it's exoskeleton would be? It takes a pair of shellfish crackers(don't know the proper term) and a good squeeze to get through a boiled one...A shell on a live rhino-sized lobster would take a .50 cal to get through.



Same goes for the other way around; rhino depends on it's power for animal thunderdome and shrinking it would not be conducive to it's survival.

Normal size lobster wins.

 

[jeremy]

Without a doubt the lobster. Those pinchers would be devastating and think about how strong it's exoskeleton would be? It takes a pair of shellfish crackers(don't know the proper term) and a good squeeze to get through a boiled one...A shell on a live rhino-sized lobster would take a .50 cal to get through.

I am not sure a .50 would actually get though the shell of a rhino sized lobster.

 

[Scutter01]

Look, you put a lobster on land and that thing is screwed. The rhino, when he gets up a full head of steam is going to trample the hell out of the lobster. Put them in water (let's make it just a few inches, to be fair), though and that lobster can get up a fair turn of speed. He'll be able to get around behind the rhino and, I dunno, "lob" him or whatever they do.

 

[spasmo]

The skin of the rhino is extremely tough though. It would be like wearing a kevlar vest. Is the fight in the water? I'm assuming it's in the water but not under water. I think it'd be a pretty good fight. I'm not sure the claws would be able to go through his skin though.

(I had to laugh because as typing this, I just got email from Joe's Crab shack)

 

[Benny]

I would also like to see a Grizzly bear fight a tiger.

I'd also like to see a larger(50-100+lbs) wolverine fight anything.

 

[printcraft]

I am not sure a .50 would actually get though the shell of a rhino sized lobster.

Well, options-options... what if the lobster had just shed it's old shell?
Bad time to be going up against a small rhino....
Think small terrier with insanely powerful jaws.

 

[Scutter01]

The skin of the rhino is extremely tough though. It would be like wearing a kevlar vest. Is the fight in the water? I'm assuming it's in the water but not under water. I think it'd be a pretty good fight. I'm not sure the claws would be able to go through his skin though.

(I had to laugh because as typing this, I just got email from Joe's Crab shack)

A rhino-sized lobster is going to have tremendous strength in its pinchers. I wouldn't count it out so quickly. What's the rhino got going for it? That charge? If the lobster can sidestep that charge, the rhino's in trouble.

 

[rhino]

Look, any biga** lobster that comes at me and tries to pinch me with that one biga** claw and the other little girly claw is going to meet with a hail of 230gr Gold Dots from each pinky-purpley fist. Freakishly huge crustaceans coming at me make me panic. Just sayin' is all.

Match-ups I want to see (with my projected winner second):

Grizzly Bear v. Polar Bear
Picard v. Kirk
Tiger Shark v. Killer Whale
Tiger Shark v. Salt Water Crocodile
Sea Otter v. Wolverine (the animal, not the mutant)
TomN (the mutant) v. Tiger Shark
Pit Bull v. Pit Bull-sized Shrew

 

[Benny]

Look, any biga** lobster that comes at me and tries to pinch me with that one biga** claw and the other little girly claw is going to meet with a hail of 230gr Gold Dots from each pinky-purpley fist. Freakishly huge crustaceans coming at me make me panic. Just sayin' is all.

Match-ups I want to see (with my projected winner second):

Grizzly Bear v. Polar Bear
Picard v. Kirk
Tiger Shark v. Killer Whale
Tiger Shark v. Salt Water Crocodile
Sea Otter v. Wolverine (the animal, not the mutant)
TomN (the mutant) v. Tiger Shark
Pit Bull v. Pit Bull-sized Shrew

You better be aiming for the eyes if you think you are going to stop a rhino-sized lobster with a couple of measly .45's.

 

[Scutter01]

Old Kirk or young Kirk? Old Kirk is doughy and he would be pretty evenly matched with Picard. Young Kirk would clean his clock.

 

[printcraft]

Look, any biga** lobster that comes at me and tries to pinch me with that one biga** claw and the other little girly claw is going to meet with a hail of 230gr Gold Dots from each pinky-purpley fist. Freakishly huge crustaceans coming at me make me panic. Just sayin' is all.

Yeah, it didn't work out too well for Roland when the lobsters came after him.
But they did not make it far either.

 

[rhino]

You better be aiming for the eyes if you think you are going to stop a rhino-sized lobster with a couple of measly .45's.

One .45 clug is no big deal. Many at the same time? Think about what a full auto .22LR can do to a cinder block ... powdah!

And furthermore, a rhino-size lobster wouldn't be able to move on land. There is a limit to the size an exoskeleton can support, which is why large terrestrial beasts are vertebrates! If he doesn't get me with that first pinch, I'm cleanin' his clock. And I'm bringin' a pickaxe too.

And a biga** Weber Grill, because after I teach him a lesson for trying to pinch me, we're havin' a barbecue with lobster on the menu.

 

[JByer323]

Oh I'd go with the rhino sized lobster. Rhinos don't see very well. He'd think he was charging something easy to trample like a penguin, Jeep, or a small child, when WAM! GIANT CLAW OF DEATH!!! TO THE FACE!!!1!1!eleventy!!shiftone

Poor sucker wouldn't stand a chance.

I'd like to see a walrus vs. a giant lemur. On hovercrafts. Think about it.

 

[JByer323]

You better be aiming for the eyes if you think you are going to stop a rhino-sized lobster with a couple of measly .45's.

I think the key here would be a big vat of melted butter.