Anyone else choosing to not have kids?

[flashpuppy]

Wow! Wasn't expecting this to be such a highly responded to thread. I honestly appreciate all the input from "both sides of the fence".

We have talked about kids, but the desire just isnt there. It seems like just creating rugrats for the sake of it IS the selfish act. There is some question as to whether my wife could carry to term anyway. Ovaries, cysts, etc. We have also discussed the possibility of adoption down the road if we develop those "something is missing" feelings.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts and opinions everyone!

 

[hoosierdoc]

If you ask a question about family INGO you'll get plenty of responses. Good folks here on

 

[96firephoenix]

My wife and I are casually trying not to have kids. we are not using any form of chemical or physical prophylactic, but we are also tracking her hormonal cycle and avoid having relations on days when she is likely to be fertile.

We just don't want to have children at this time. We know its selfish.

 

[hoosierdoc]

We just don't want to have children at this time. We know its selfish.

It's not selfish, it's planning.

 

[sadclownwp]

I'd say 95% of children or more are poor financial investments. I don't mind when poor financial investments are made, as long as I and the other tax payers are not burdened.

I say all the child tax breaks should be dropped, it is not right to burden those without children. Instead, those with children should have to burden more tax. 100% of school funding should only be taken from those who have children, because they are clearly reaping the most benefit. That funding should be collected from birth till graduation, after all, once the child graduates, they should be considered an adult.

 

[88GT]

Every aspect of having children is expensive. Pregnancy is physically demanding and emotionally trying. Birth is gross. Dirty diapers whose contents have escaped and somehow made its way down to tip of toes and up to shoulder blades is grosser. Spit up is timed to occur when you have just put on a clean shirt. Lack of sleep can lead to murderous thoughts. Repeating yourself 5x a day for the simplest instructions will drive one to commit oneself. Looking back on one's previous life (freedom)can be discouraging.

But when your child looks you in the eye and says,"Mommy/Daddy, I love you," all of the above ceases to matter.

If you don't want children, that's fine. There is nothing wrong with that. But if despite your efforts to prevent, it happens anyway, I doubt you will regret it.

 

[Benny]

Every aspect of having children is expensive. Pregnancy is physically demanding and emotionally trying. Birth is gross. Dirty diapers whose contents have escaped and somehow made its way down to tip of toes and up to shoulder blades is grosser. Spit up is timed to occur when you have just put on a clean shirt. Lack of sleep can lead to murderous thoughts. Repeating yourself 5x a day for the simplest instructions will drive one to commit oneself. Looking back on one's previous life (freedom)can be discouraging.

But when your child looks you in the eye and says,"Mommy/Daddy, I love you," all of the above ceases to matter.

If you don't want children, that's fine. There is nothing wrong with that. But if despite your efforts to prevent, it happens anyway, I doubt you will regret it.

Wait, you only repeat yourself 5 times a day for simple instructions? What is your secret?

 

[CitiusFortius]

100% of school funding should only be taken from those who have children, because they are clearly reaping the most benefit.

Short sighted and incorrect. A good school system has a positive effect on property values. Taxes are what they are because they are shared by everyone. For a school to receive the same funding from a fraction of the people means those people with kids would see a HUGE increase in tax bill. One harder to pay because youre taking away their federal tax returns.

This would cause 2 things, those "responsible" couples would not have kids as you have made it much too expensive -or- irresponsible people would still have a bunch causing them to plummet below the poverty line at which point you and the government will be supporting them anyway.

Good schools mean people get into good colleges. And remember clown, Everything good in your life:computer, car, doctor, INGO was created by someone elses kid. So I'd say that you have benefitted from their education more than you might realize.

 

[churchmouse]

I'd say 95% of children or more are poor financial investments. I don't mind when poor financial investments are made, as long as I and the other tax payers are not burdened.

I say all the child tax breaks should be dropped, it is not right to burden those without children. Instead, those with children should have to burden more tax. 100% of school funding should only be taken from those who have children, because they are clearly reaping the most benefit. That funding should be collected from birth till graduation, after all, once the child graduates, they should be considered an adult.

Really.

That is a terrible way to access a child....an investment. Seems way to bottom line.

We sent our kids to a private school and still paid all the accessed taxes for the public system. Not a happy thing but it is the way of things.

Investments.....

 

[Snapdragon]

 

[JetGirl]

We sent our kids to a private school and still paid all the accessed taxes for the public system.

Same here. We paid for buses our kid couldn't ride, paid salaries for teachers who didn't teach our kid, paid for the maintenance of buildings and property we never set foot on... and all sorts of same such.
I don't recall "clearly reaping" any "benefit".

 

[goinggreyfast]

Really.

That is a terrible way to access a child....an investment. Seems way to bottom line.

We sent our kids to a private school and still paid all the accessed taxes for the public system. Not a happy thing but it is the way of things.

Investments.....

Yes he's technically correct, children are a financial burden, but I agree that classifying children as investments is pretty cold--IMHO. Having grown up with 3 sibs, there are always costs to deal with. I would venture to say though that my parents would have done it all again if given the chance. Looking back, I kinda wish we had made a few of those "investments"

 

[churchmouse]

Same here. We paid for buses our kid couldn't ride, paid salaries for teachers who didn't teach our kid, paid for the maintenance of buildings and property we never set foot on... and all sorts of same such.
I don't recall "clearly reaping" any "benefit".

Guess I am just a terrible business man.

Still shaking my head on the investment thing though. People can see it for what it is or find reason not to get involved. If return is the issue......Hahahahaha....aint no money coming back my way.....

 

[88GT]

Short sighted and incorrect. A good school system has a positive effect on property values. Taxes are what they are because they are shared by everyone. For a school to receive the same funding from a fraction of the people means those people with kids would see a HUGE increase in tax bill. One harder to pay because youre taking away their federal tax returns.

This would cause 2 things, those "responsible" couples would not have kids as you have made it much too expensive -or- irresponsible people would still have a bunch causing them to plummet below the poverty line at which point you and the government will be supporting them anyway.

Good schools mean people get into good colleges. And remember clown, Everything good in your life:computer, car, doctor, INGO was created by someone elses kid. So I'd say that you have benefitted from their education more than you might realize.

Short-sighted and incorrect.

Whether or not government schools have any benefit on property values is debatable, but education is a personal responsibility and it is theft and coercion to force your neighbors to pay for it for any children but their own. People who don't have kids shouldn't have to pay for it. And certainly not through property taxes. Subsidized education is no different than welfare and Obamacare.

Bad schools turn out college graduates too. And it's a logical fallacy to imply that anything worthwhile in this world is the result of an education from a government school.

While I very much disagree with clown's characterization of children as investments, I do agree that the community should not have to pay for what is solely a parental responsibility.

 

[hornadylnl]

As long as I can remember, I've been a problem solver. Math was always my best academic subject and I enjoyed it. Here's a problem, now find an answer. I've always enjoyed taking something that was broken and fixing it. I've been working in maintenance for 8 years and now run circles around my counterparts. They constantly give me people to train and it drives me absolutely crazy. I have ZERO gift of teaching. I see a problem and I figure out in my mind how to fix it. It's translating that picture in my brain to others that drives me insane. I can see it, why can't they?

Now imagine sitting at the dinner table almost every night for years trying to get your child to understand math. You know they don't understand it but you don't know how to explain it or teach it in a way that they'll get it.

A machine is a piece of equipment. It's either broke or it's not. There is a fix and you just have to figure it out. It doesn't have a mind of it it's own. When you can't see what your child is thinking, it's exponentially harder. The hardest thing I've ever done in my life is try to raise a child.

 

[BE Mike]

Short-sighted and incorrect.

Whether or not government schools have any benefit on property values is debatable, but education is a personal responsibility and it is theft and coercion to force your neighbors to pay for it for any children but their own. People who don't have kids shouldn't have to pay for it. And certainly not through property taxes. Subsidized education is no different than welfare and Obamacare.

Bad schools turn out college graduates too. And it's a logical fallacy to imply that anything worthwhile in this world is the result of an education from a government school.

While I very much disagree with clown's characterization of children as investments, I do agree that the community should not have to pay for what is solely a parental responsibility.

I am not a huge fan of public schools, but I think that an educated populace contributes directly to our society. One of the things that keep the people in Third World countries subjugated is an uneducated large lower class. I don't often call for the police or fire department for service, but I don't regret contributing my tax money to support them. There are plenty of other government departments that could be eliminated or reduced in size. I do think that the federal government has overreached and put it's tentacles into local government. That would be a good place to start improving things to lower taxes.

 

[churchmouse]

As long as I can remember, I've been a problem solver. Math was always my best academic subject and I enjoyed it. Here's a problem, now find an answer. I've always enjoyed taking something that was broken and fixing it. I've been working in maintenance for 8 years and now run circles around my counterparts. They constantly give me people to train and it drives me absolutely crazy. I have ZERO gift of teaching. I see a problem and I figure out in my mind how to fix it. It's translating that picture in my brain to others that drives me insane. I can see it, why can't they?

Now imagine sitting at the dinner table almost every night for years trying to get your child to understand math. You know they don't understand it but you don't know how to explain it or teach it in a way that they'll get it.

A machine is a piece of equipment. It's either broke or it's not. There is a fix and you just have to figure it out. It doesn't have a mind of it it's own. When you can't see what your child is thinking, it's exponentially harder. The hardest thing I've ever done in my life is try to raise a child.

This^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Parenting is the absolute most difficult undertaking. Expensive and stressful.
Wait till they start to drive. Every phone call makes the heart jump. Especially after the 1st incident. The phone ringing after 9:00 P.M. is never good.

 

[churchmouse]

I am not a huge fan of public schools, but I think that an educated populace contributes directly to our society. One of the things that keep the people in Third World countries subjugated is an uneducated large lower class. I don't often call for the police or fire department for service, but I don't regret contributing my tax money to support them. There are plenty of other government departments that could be eliminated or reduced in size. I do think that the federal government has overreached and put it's tentacles into local government. That would be a good place to start improving things to lower taxes.

The schools we are building are monuments. Simplify the structures and simplify the system

 

[lovemachine]

If you compare having children to financial investing, then I pray you never ever have kids.


As one who had held my wife's hand thru 3 miscarriage, I cannot wait to have children. I have played with my niece and nephew lots of times, and I can honestly say that all children are a gift.

 

[88GT]

I am not a huge fan of public schools, but I think that an educated populace contributes directly to our society. One of the things that keep the people in Third World countries subjugated is an uneducated large lower class. I don't often call for the police or fire department for service, but I don't regret contributing my tax money to support them. There are plenty of other government departments that could be eliminated or reduced in size. I do think that the federal government has overreached and put it's tentacles into local government. That would be a good place to start improving things to lower taxes.

And your argument presupposes that no government schools = no education. First problem.

Government education is not on the same level as a public good/service such a s fire/police. Second problem.

If you wish to contribute to the financial responsibilities of other people, have at it. Do not make the mistake of thinking that you have any right to coerce your fellow citizens to do so by using the government to confiscate their property.