Your children don't live with you....how are you going to get them when SHTF?

[millsusaf]

Unfortunately many of us are divorced and our children doesn't live with us. Heck this could happen even for those of us lucky enough not to be divorced but the kids are just at school, a friends house, or the grandparents.

How are you planning on getting them when SHTF?

I've actually started to have this discussion with my ex (we get along very well...mostly) and her response was "well I figure we will all come over" (she is remarried). I laughed and said you better bring lots to offer if so. hahahaha

My son and I are only 15 miles apart but during SHTF that 15 miles is going to be rough especially with a 4 year old.

What plans do you have in place?

 

[Steve]

Excellent post. This is one of my main concerns. Yes, I am prepped to take care of myself and my wife and hunker down for an extended stay ( bugging out is the very last resort). But my son lives 50 miles away and my daughter (the kool aid drinker) lives 30 in a different direction. And #3 daughter is nuts anyway. Even in the best of times, no one gets along. It's like have Christmas with the Mason family rather then the Waltons here during the holidays.

Anyway, I see no easy way to get them all here physically, let alone mentally. All I can do is be ready should they somehow make it here and lay down the law upon their arrival. My way or the highway. They're not going to like it, but I will NOT put my wife or myself in jeparody because of their stupidity.

Can I turn them away? I hope that I never have to make that choice. But, if that day and moment comes...........well, I did my best to raise them and teach them about life and making choices. And, more importantly, the consequences of making bad choices. Hopefully, those lessons will come back to them if the SHTF and they can make it here. If not, it ain't gonna be pretty.

 

[6birds]

Anyway, I see no easy way to get them all here physically, let alone mentally. All I can do is be ready should they somehow make it here and lay down the law upon their arrival. My way or the highway. They're not going to like it, but I will NOT put my wife or myself in jeparody because of their stupidity.

Can I turn them away? I hope that I never have to make that choice. But, if that day and moment comes...........well, I did my best to raise them and teach thm about life and making choices. And, more importantly, the consequences of making bad choices. Hopefully, those lessons will come back to them if the SHTF and they can make it here. If not, it ain't gonna be pretty.

Well said!

 

[redneckmedic]

Kids are a huge roadblock to SHTF, from food, to clothes, toys, dental, education, combat tactics... Overtime all of these will become issues. Some on a bigger scale than others but it all has to be planned for. How quick will you kids out grow their clothes? How well will the keep entertained without getting too injured? If you are being attacked, how do you protect them... or keep them quiet? They have very dynamic immune systems that are always growing, thus always getting sick. Just food for thought.. Great Post!

 

[flagtag]

My son and his daughter live with me, so no problem there. But, my daughter and her family (husband and two kids, 11 & 20) live in IN - about 50-60 miles away. They may decide to stay with his parents (I hope not) and their large family. I would do my best to get them here. (Not the in-laws) I do worry about that a lot, tho.

 

[360]

I'm divorced once, but both of my kids live with me.

 

[millsusaf]

The area between him and I is actually fairly rural however there are probably close to 50 subdivisions in the way, 3 main through fairs along with numerous secondary roads. My main concern isn't getting there as I'm pretty confident I could get there unnoticed (assuming I'm on foot) but getting back is going to be an entirely different story.

We have been on hikes before trying to find animals but they heard his little butt from miles away. Getting him to be quite for that trip back would be next to impossible. Heck just having him walk 15 miles would be almost impossible.

I guess the key is to get to him ASAP and get back hopefully in a vehicle.

 

[redneckmedic]

The area between him and I is actually fairly rural however there are probably close to 50 subdivisions in the way, 3 main through fairs along with numerous secondary roads. My main concern isn't getting there as I'm pretty confident I could get there unnoticed (assuming I'm on foot) but getting back is going to be an entirely different story.

We have been on hikes before trying to find animals but they heard his little butt from miles away. Getting him to be quite for that trip back would be next to impossible. Heck just having him walk 15 miles would be almost impossible.

I guess the key is to get to him ASAP and get back hopefully in a vehicle.

Buy a dune buggy and keep it fueled, and hidden in an under ground cave. Thats the best I got. (although a mountain bike with a pull behind isn't such a bad idea)

 

[ThrottleJockey]

If you are being attacked, how do you protect them... or keep them quiet?

This is a big concern. Some of the preps I have just can't be found for small children....Like gas masks...how do I deal with that?

 

[csaws]

Sorry Medic I disagree that my kids in a SHTF are a roadblock, a speedbump yes on most days let alone SHTF. I say the easiest way to keep them entertained is to not coddle them, let them play in a safe manner, parents that hover over their kids tend to have kids getting hurt more often than non helicopter parents...IMO, why you ask? Tell a kid not to do something they will do it anyway sooner or later, my opinion on it is teach them to climb a tree the right way and frequently then turn them loose for learning experiences OTJ style, they will learn the limits.

Side story my brother and I used to jump from the top of the barn we had on our farm when we were kids into the hay and straw "chaff" 15-20 feet below, why because we could mostly, we quickly figured out swinging on the rope and then jumping was a lot more fun and safer to boot.

 

[Indiana_Dave]

I think if SHTF, we have a responsibility to protect our kids, whether they live with us or not; and whether the ex is remarried or not. Obviously, from the perspective of a SHTF scenario, it'd be better if mom and dad were together. If not, a next best plan would be to try to be near by. Also, no matter the situation, teach them skills. No need to tell them why they're learning to shoot, camp, cook, and most importantly, to be self sufficient. These are important lessons, SHTF or not.

Lastly, at least one comment talked about the burden of kids. Some day, they will be an asset if SHTF, if you have taught them.

 

[millsusaf]

I agree completely, I will do anything and everything I possibly can if/when SHTF to get to my son. The ex knows this. Her husband is nice, we get along during our limited contact, but from what I've seen he will be almost useless when SHTF. I'm by no mean Mr. Survivalist but it wouldn't surprise me if the ex doesn't want to come stay with us. hahahaha Oh how much fun that would be fun....N O T.

 

[40calPUNISHER]

Over the river and through the woods. When the SHTF I will be driving through front yards, back yards, side yards, farmers fields, on the wrong side of the road etc.... Have you ever seen "driving in Iraq'? That will be me. I'm not going to wait in traffic or sit at stoplights if I am going to get my daughter.

YouTube - Humvee Traffic Driving in Iraq

 

[shftn6]

The area between him and I is actually fairly rural however there are probably close to 50 subdivisions in the way, 3 main through fairs along with numerous secondary roads. My main concern isn't getting there as I'm pretty confident I could get there unnoticed (assuming I'm on foot) but getting back is going to be an entirely different story.

We have been on hikes before trying to find animals but they heard his little butt from miles away. Getting him to be quite for that trip back would be next to impossible. Heck just having him walk 15 miles would be almost impossible.

I guess the key is to get to him ASAP and get back hopefully in a vehicle.

All due respect here, but do you really think your EX WIFE is going to let you take off WALKING with her (and your) 4 year old on a 15 mile "hike" in a serious SHTF situation? I mean seriously, no one knows for sure what's really going on, or how dangerous the situation really is (lack of reliable info). The situation is apparently bad enough that you had to sneak 15 miles to their place, and now you propose WALKING back with a 4 year old! You can't move fast, and you can't move quiet.

I know you love your kid, and you want to be with him if things get bad. But, what if some crazy puts a bullet in your head and decides to do what he wants with your son? IMHO any 4 (or 6, or 8) year old is better off with the EX (who also loves him, remember!) under roof, and lock and key, than out on a commando mission with his dad in a SHTF situation, no matter how well intentioned you might be. My advice would be to rethink your plan. Just my $0.02.

 

[RandyN2075]

Distance isn't as much a factor for us as we are all pretty much within 5-10 miles of each other. Though my wife and I are in pretty good shape, we don't have the resources to care for all the kids, spouses and their children. We would never turn any of them away though and we would get by for a while. I still have a deer in the freezer besides my emergency supplies...we will make do...

 

[anewrnn]

I agree with the above post

That was kinda my plan too, to just pick/take my daughter and leave if I don't have her at the time. But, after reading it from another member it does sound kinda "off". I fear I would have to either bring my ex along, whom I really can't stand for too long as she is a total priss or take my daugter by force which I don't really care to do either. I guess the only option is to bring the ex with and do what's right for my daughter. If the stuff really went haywire it would be a very sticky situation. Very good post. Ill rep you for that one!

 

[millsusaf]

All due respect here, but do you really think your EX WIFE is going to let you take off WALKING with her (and your) 4 year old on a 15 mile "hike" in a serious SHTF situation? I mean seriously, no one knows for sure what's really going on, or how dangerous the situation really is (lack of reliable info). The situation is apparently bad enough that you had to sneak 15 miles to their place, and now you propose WALKING back with a 4 year old! You can't move fast, and you can't move quiet.

I know you love your kid, and you want to be with him if things get bad. But, what if some crazy puts a bullet in your head and decides to do what he wants with your son? IMHO any 4 (or 6, or 8) year old is better off with the EX (who also loves him, remember!) under roof, and lock and key, than out on a commando mission with his dad in a SHTF situation, no matter how well intentioned you might be. My advice would be to rethink your plan. Just my $0.02.

You do have a very good point. I think the key is going to be getting to him ASAP via car, before anything too bad happens or it gets worse. If it's to the point of sneaking around on foot it might already be too late. Having said that though I can't imagine not being able to be there to protect my son.

My ex has no preps even though we have talked about it several times. Although she always liked to shoot guns with me and is a very good shot, she herself has recently told me that she isn't going to get one even though I have darn near begged her to.

I need to somehow convince her to get on board. Even if they were safe in the locked house, they wouldn't make it more than two weeks without running out of even the most basic things.....I doubt even that long.

Our current wives, girlfriends don't have much choice in the matter but has anyone been able to convince your Ex to prep? If so, how?

Thanks

 

[anewrnn]

I'd like to know the answer too!!!

My ex wants me to "give" her one of my guns as she won't spend the money on one for herself. She will save money for a vacation or new pet but instantly turns the discussion to my fault if something bad happens to my daughter b/c I basically wouldnt share. I am very apprehensive/damn near scared to give my ex a gun but sometimes I feel somewhat bad. I too have mentioned storing some water but she wont do it unless I buy.

 

[millsusaf]

My ex wants me to "give" her one of my guns as she won't spend the money on one for herself. She will save money for a vacation or new pet but instantly turns the discussion to my fault if something bad happens to my daughter b/c I basically wouldnt share. I am very apprehensive/damn near scared to give my ex a gun but sometimes I feel somewhat bad. I too have mentioned storing some water but she wont do it unless I buy.

No offense but I see why you two are divorced, good lord. With her logic or lack there of, when SHTF I hope you can get to your daughter because I think your ex will fall off her rocker and go nuts!

 

[Woodsman]

My ex wants me to "give" her one of my guns as she won't spend the money on one for herself. She will save money for a vacation or new pet but instantly turns the discussion to my fault if something bad happens to my daughter b/c I basically wouldnt share. I am very apprehensive/damn near scared to give my ex a gun but sometimes I feel somewhat bad. I too have mentioned storing some water but she wont do it unless I buy.

I wouldn't take the chance of giving a gun to anyone (including my daughter), and especially an ex-wife. Yeah, I have one of those too unfortunately. I'll help the kid to get one but everyone else is on their own. The reason is below....

If the gun is registered in your name and something happens while in her possession I have a good idea where the LEO's will start looking once the gun is recovered.