WHAT WOULD YOU DO?????? HELP

[Yosarian87]

Child first. Firearms are great but ya gotta think about the kid.

 

[dom1104]

Drama.

 

[BumpShadow]

Uh, call me old fasion, but why are you not married? Granted 7 years would constitute a common law marriage, but still...

And I agree with what others have said, if you know you anger issue I can only imagine how bad it really is. Even if you don't think you would pull a gun on a loved one in a fit of rage, it's not guaranteed. I would work on the anger thing and winning your gf trust first. Or at least find out what she is really coming from. Good luck

 

[redbeard28]

thank you all for you're help i asked her if she would get on here and read some of the post we talked about it and as of right now i can own a gun just have to keep it at a friends house while it is not ideal for HD (lol) its a start i will have to talk to her about gun safety and different locking systems for them. . . . . plus she admitted to being terrified of guns so that has a lot to do with it. . once again thank you all for you're help

 

[Mr. Habib]

There has been some great advice already posted here. I will only add this. Since you have indicated that the issue is with firearms in general and not with you personally owning them, perhaps you can help her overcome her fears be taking some safety classes together.

 

[INyooper]

thank you all for you're help i asked her if she would get on here and read some of the post we talked about it and as of right now i can own a gun just have to keep it at a friends house while it is not ideal for HD (lol) its a start i will have to talk to her about gun safety and different locking systems for them. . . . . plus she admitted to being terrified of guns so that has a lot to do with it. . once again thank you all for you're help

Wow, great! It's not optimal, but she and your son aren't headed anywhere soon without you ...they aren't, are they???

Also, if you'd like, I'd offer to keep your gun(s) for you. You're welcome to come by and take a look at them any time you'd like! ...hey, just trying to do my part to help!

Definitely do some training, whether there was an issue with guns or not. There are some great gun mags at the news stand as well. Then, of course, INGO is a fantastic resource that you both can get a great deal from reading. ...and the whole bacon thing is just a bonus!

Keep us posted

 

[redbeard28]

lol no they are not headed anywhere and yes i would like to take some classes and get her involved as much as i can so she will not feel scared by a firearm one step at a time

 

[GARANDGUY]

You have to explain to her that MILLIONS of homes have KIDS & GUNS. SAFETY is the key for both to be under the same roof

This! You and her could also take a few courses to become more firmiliar with your weapon and how to use it properly to defend yourselves. This would also give you both an added sense of security and make her more comfortable in the fact there is a gun in the house. Hell she might even enjoy it and then you have created a monster,lol. Hope it all works out for ya man keep us updated.

 

[GARANDGUY]

i am sorry the boy is ours. i really don't want to leave her or for her to leave me she said if i was going to buy a gun she was going to leave, , , then she said that even if we split up she cant stand the thought of HER(our) son being in a house w a gun so she was going to move down to Florida w some family and try to stop me from seeing my son at all cost which i think is pretty petty

Sounds like she already has her mind made up regardless. Get a lawyer and make sure she cant take him anywhere (out of state)without your written consent! My ex took my daughter and ran off years ago and I couldnt find them for years up til a few years ago when I got a letter and notice from her lawyer and the court saying she wasnt my child and I had no rights to her. C.Y.A. man! Im sorry to hear it.

 

[jeremy]

I would go to an Internet Forum and discuss it with Total Strangers instead of discussing it with my Significant Other...

 

[dom1104]

I would go to an Internet Forum and discuss it with Total Strangers instead of discussing it with my Significant Other...

Rep for this. Hilarious.

 

[Sylvain]

I think it has NOTHING to do with the gun.If she wants to leave you if you ever get a gun then your main problem is not the gun but its TRUST.
I dont think you will find any answer you need here in a gun forum because its not about the gun.The problem is deeper.
You have greater problem than that and the question is not "do I get a gun or not".
The question would be "Why im I with a woman who wants to leave me and doesnt trust me?".
It's a relationship issue, not just a gun issue.Maybe it has to do with your "anger problem".I dont know but I dont think it has ANYTHING to do with the gun.

At one point I wanted to get a gun and my girlfriend thought it was not a good idea.
We talked about it.She trust me with her life and also trust my skills with a gun so she said yes.
I got a gun.Then I told her I wanted to get my carry licence.She thought it was silly and that only police officers need to carry a gun and all those other things that "non-gun people" think because of the media.

Anyway we talked again about that too and as the smart woman she is she finally realized that it wasnt a bad idea.
Next thing she ask me is if I would like to open carry or conceal carry after we talked about the two options.
She NEVER felt scared because I wanted a gun, she NEVER said that she would leave if I ever get the gun.
THIS was a gun related issue, I dont think its whats going on in your couple.

 

[Andre46996]

If you don't let me go out with my friends I am taking the kid and leaving.

If you don't buy me this i am taking the kid and leaving.

If you don't allow me to sleep around i am taking the kid and leaving.

You don't like I have another BF too bad i am taking the kid and leaving.

Welcome to hell, i hope you enjoy your stay.

If I was you and I am not so consider this free advice and you know how much that is worth.

I would be contacting a lawyer and family court, since you are not married i would establish custody, and the I would start distancing yourself from her. She sounds like she knows exactly how to manipulate you and will for the rest of your life.

Life is to short to live it in a horrible relationship.

 

[6birds]

I would be contacting a lawyer and family court, since you are not married i would establish custody, and the I would start distancing yourself from her. She sounds like she knows exactly how to manipulate you and will for the rest of your life.

Life is to short to live it in a horrible relationship.

Good post here for all the eunuchs looking to rationalize the garbage relationships they are in. I hope you get your junk back.

 

[EnochRoot43]

Redbeard, good for you for the progress you have made. My wife always knew I had guns and never liked them. When we had a child, the situation was a bit more of a delicate dance. Then, my interest in shooting and firearms began to increase, I bought more guns and spent more time here at INGO, and her irritation was palatable for months. Then, she got a Red Ryder for Christmas from MY parents. She got a huge kick out of shooting pop cans and targets, but only had it out a few times this winter.

As nice weather arrived, she showed a bit of interest in going to the range to try my .22, but it hadn't worked out until two weeks ago when she asked me if she could come along when a buddy and I went to Wilbur Wright. She had a blast and was an excellent shot!

She remained hesitant about handguns, and still shies away from the 9mm, but has shot the Kel Tec .32 on two occasions now, and really enjoyed shooting it the last time. When financially able, I think we will try and get her a Walther .22 or a Ruger Single Six type revolver. She is trying to place a claim on my 10/22 now, so one of us is going to be getting a new one of those as well.

Just illustrating that attitudes do change. My wife's family is pretty liberal (hence her old attitude) and still disapprove of me having guns in the house with a toddler, but I am just happy to have a newly enthusiastic mate and shooting partner.

Good luck to you......just take it slow, don't push the issue, and try to illustrate the joy and fun in shooting sports. The Red Ryder piqued my wife's interest, but I think what sold her was the camaraderie and friendship that strangers showed at Wilbur Wright that day. Friendly, neighborly people chatting to each other and shooting with their kids and significant others.....I think it was a different scene than she might have envisioned, and she felt very welcomed.

 

[ElsiePeaRN]

Uh, call me old fasion, but why are you not married? ...

-Knock Knock
---Who's There?
-Nunya
---Nunya Who?
-Nunya Business

Sorry But I don't see this as having anything to do with the OPs question.

Granted 7 years would constitute a common law marriage, but still...

There is no such thing as common law marriage in the state of Indiana no matter how long a couple is together.

/threadjack.

 

[JetGirl]

perhaps you can help her overcome her fears be taking some safety classes together.

EXCELLENT advice ^.

There is no such thing as common law marriage in the state of Indiana no matter how long a couple is together.

Yeah, that ^.

 

[sweddle]

There have numerous sensible post regarding your issue at hand. Great job INGO posters. IMO, your child comes first, regardless of how rational or irrational your wife/ GF is. Meaning, you can't protect your family if they up and move away. Look at different ways to protect them. In time, hopefully you are able to demonstrate your ever improving anger management skills, you educate your family on firearms safety, and perhaps warm your wife/ GF up to the thought of firearms ownership. One of the biggest points that I present to you is to buy a safe before you buy the firearm. I know, once you save up that much cash, you want to buy the firearm, but the handgun safe, is as important as the handgun itself when it comes to your children. IMHO.

 

[03A3]

I didn't read all of this. It's late and I'm tired. From what I did read, and going by my experiance, and that of some friends, I see trouble coming whether there is a gun involved or not. I may very well be wrong about that.
I would keep my arse covered, and start forming a plan and building a case against her very discreetly.
I know this sucks, I've been there. I have custody of my daughter.
I don't really know what else to tell you. I wish you the best.
Above all else keep your cool. You just have to be tough enough to take whatever she dishes out.

 

[nicajack]

"I'm gonna miss her.......