The Problem With Having A 19 Year Old In The Home

[Trigger Time]

I wouldn't have gotten away with it under my parents roof no matter how old I was.

 

[WebSnyper]

My 18 year old came in with a tat I looked at it then looked at him and told if he could afford a tat he could afford rent!! $50.00 bucks a week! no more tats!

Nice ink, but at 19 and still in the home (I am assuming he isn't in school) time for a rent check!

at least he didn't get it on his neck or face!

definitely well done, but I'm in the "if you can afford a tattoo, you can afford rent" camp.

Just because they can make their own decisions doesn't mean they're gonna like the results of that decision. Law of unintended consequences, Son.

Pretty much my thought. Depends on if they are paying their own way or not. I'm definitely in the if you can afford to do certain things, you can pay rent camp as well.

 

[1775usmarine]

I didn't get my first tat till I was in the service. It was July 2005 Ft Leonardwood MO 4th of July break from MOS school. My dad and stepmom came down to visit and as a late Bday gift he bought my first Tat. I then got majority of my ink in Okinawa.

 

[Leo]

.

 

[Leo]

For the bigger picture of the parent child relationship, the tattoo is not much different than anything else a 19 year old may purchase. What if it was a piece of tech equipment, a musical instrument, what if it was a stock portfolio? What ever the purchase was is seperate from the residential issues.

I have no problem with the need for financial participation in the household budget. Is the rent due for responsible participation, or is it a punishment for an unapproved purchase ?

Why is the young person still at the house?
Is there a plan?
Does the purchase violate part of the plan?
Are the boundaries of respect being observed?

By separating the established expectations of the household relationship from the purchase (and motive) of a tattoo, you can deal with one without disturbing the other. It would be tragic to destroy what is working properly by a knee jerk of an emotionally charged subject.

On the other side of the coin, (esp. if there is no planned agreement why the 19 year old is still at home) the Tattoo may be also be a signal that it is time to leave the childhood nest.

 

[bigelowe]

I was in my early 20's out of my parents house and out of college before I could even get my ear pierced. When I came home with ghe earring you would have thought it was the end of the world. I have a 16 yo son. Ive done my best to raise him with proper morals and values. Other people tell me be is a great kid,so I guess I have dkne a good job so far. I hope he stays true to his values when he leaves thd nest. he has both ears pierced, j gave my approval before he got it done

 

[Indyhd]

For the bigger picture of the parent child relationship, the tattoo is not much different than anything else a 19 year old may purchase. What if it was a piece of tech equipment, a musical instrument, what if it was a stock portfolio? What ever the purchase was is seperate from the residential issues.


I think the tattoo is certainly different from the other purchases you illustrate above seeing as down the road if needed the others could be resold. I'm sure we have all made impulse buys. Unfortunately the tat is not easily resold.

I would just be happy if my daughter would buy dog food for the worthless fleabag living at my house. Yes, I am a dog lover...but I want to be supporting MY dog.

 

[ruger1800]

Still trying to figure out what part of his body the tat is on, anyway hope it wasn't done in an ally or van with needles contaminated with hepatitis aids ect...

 

[Beorn]

I made the same "good decision" to get a tattoo when I was younger. If I remember right I apologized to my parents, for all the crap I put them through when I was younger, was when I was in my late 20's. I now have 2 beautiful daughters (4 & 9) so I'm sure payback is going to be HELL

 

[forgop]

There's plenty of those happening under 18 without parental permission.

Just be thankful it's not the neck/facial tats I see-and they wonder why they can't get a decent job.