If she can't understand the utility of self-defense then she's not very useful.
Not trying to denigrate your wife, but *******, that's one big steaming pile.
Does she understand that dreams are dreams and that reality is reality?
I don't know, I hope she comes back to her senses for both your sakes.
If not, you'll resent her and she'll grow to fear you.
How "useful" she is can't be conveyed in a few sentences, but believe me she is in many ways. Although this one area has been a subject of contention between the two of us, I do believe in the 80/20 rule when it comes to marriage. Believe me, like any other marriage, my 80 is absolutely wonderful and my 20 is sometimes less than; however mine only consists of communication about guns and just like with the MC, that issue may be moot in our lives, but only time will tell.
I understand that one cannot put "touchy" subjects on the forum and then get an attitude when the feedback is not quite appreciated, but to suggest someone's wife is not useful can sting a bit, but I don't take offense at what you said.
Even if she were to come back next week with the same argument, I still wouldn't trade her for anyone else. I may have joked out of frustration, but we are solid and plan to last until death do us part. I never made that commitment to my guns, but I understand the importance of personal and home defense. It's my job to allow her the time to understand, as well. Especially since I did such a crappy job of communicating that point to her the last year or so, when this became an issue in our lives (not 20 years ago). As time goes on, I will learn how to convey the importance of self defense as I have the importance of other things like education, salvation, community involvement, and other quality of life issues.
I'm not being retaliatory in any way, but I think it's important that you know that the reason this happened MAY be that she has ulterior motives, but most likely it's due to a lack of understanding. The years we have together dictates I give her the benefit of the doubt and go with the latter.
The point you made about me resenting her and she fearing me was right on point. I can definitely see that happening if I hadn't taken the advice of many and just talked to her. I figured I shouldn't have to explain and I was wrong to think the defense of my home was my responsibility alone. I will now work to show/reah her that she plays an important role and is needed in this effort.
The reason I put this issue up here is because I have no personal friends who are gun owners. I have one who has a gun, but he has it for novelty, not defense. There is no way any of them could have provided me the guidance I have received here. I think this thread may be beneficial to anyone in my shoes and I thank you for your input, as well.
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