No joy for my 13 year old son at the range

[Scuba591]

So my son, daughter and I had range time today. As usual, several hours prior to getting to the range I was reviewing safety and trying to get their minds thinking correctly. They both wanted to try shooting my SR 22. Since this would be the first time shooting this hand gun and basically the first time to shoot a hand gun, I was going over proper grip and such. The 13 year old wanted nothing to do with learning and said he wanted to use a grip that would have put his off hand thumb in the path of the slide. This turned into a failed attempt to teach him and he got an attitude. He was unable to change his poor attitude and ended up sitting in the car watching my daughter and I shoot for 2 hours.
I could not in good conscience have him around firearms with a poor mindset.... not because he may do something on purpose... rather something stupid because his mind was not in the game. Anyone with teenagers will understand this. I know that it was the right thing to do and safety prevailed. It just sucks that we could not shoot together.
** discuss**

 

[JetGirl]

Good call.
I've cut range time short (or off) for similar stuff with kids. It usually only takes once.

 

[DemolitionMan]

You did the right thing not giving into the "I'm a teenager and therefore I don't need to listen to you" nonsense. He'll come around.

 

[Hookeye]

Teens can have attitudes, they just have to be trained to keep that BS inside.

I'd have been thumped and then sent to the car.

Thumped for way less, way earlier....................behavior properly modified.

 

[sescbo]

A teenager's worst enemy is themselves. You did the right thing. If he didn't want to give you & shooting the proper respect they deserve than it's his loss.

 

[sparkyfender]

​Children should be beaten and not heard.

 

[brotherbill3]

Good Call; with firearms - its the safe way or no. period. end.

Now hopefully the lesson is learned.

 

[T.Lex]

First, I have no problem with what you did. I'm not one to criticize someone else's parenting choices.

Second, I have teen daughters (similar, but different, set of problems) and my son won't be a teen for a couple more years. I'm trying to anticipate what I would do in your situation. Did you show him mechanically how you could teach him that he was doing it wrong, but it would be much more painful? I would've been tempted to say, "You think you got it all figured out? Let's see how that works out for you."

I mean, that almost seems like the classic you-only-touch-the-hot-burner-one-time type lesson.

Again, please don't think I'm criticizing, just trying to figure out how the discussion would go.

ETA: My son has been shooting 2x already with .22LR long guns and been very attentive and rule-conscious. (More than his dad on 1 occasion.)

 

[Ryno300]

Excellent job. It hurts when a planned event and family time goes awry. Way to put safety first. My son is just starting to show some interest and asking questions. I'm trying to make sure I stop everything that I'm doing and answer his questions in a calm, constructive manner. I think my attitude and actions influence him more than I know sometimes. Hope next time is better trip to the range.

 

[EdC]

Good job, and it's great that you didn't let him spoil the outing for you and your daughter.

 

[KittySlayer]

Was just walking through the gun store after lunch at the range. A dad and his 13 year old boy come in.

First thing the kid ask is "do they let you hold the guns in this store?"

Dad's reply "Not you as you have not shown enough responsibility lately." Nice to see some quality parenting going on and it must be working because the kid accepted dad's statement without pouting or throwing a fit, the kid simply looked instead of touching and was already asking the clerk some questions.

Guy behind the counter keeps his mouth shut and lets dad be a dad. I know some places where the guy behind the counter would screw up the whole learning lesson and volunteer "sure, we let kids hold guns here."

 

[Mark 1911]

Good call.

Might as well learn early, follow the rules or don't play. Guns and attitude don't mix, true regardless of age.

 

[ModernGunner]

I understand it was a tough call, Scuba. But I gotta agree with the decision you made with your son.

Yes, we have fun with firearms. Yes, we make up various forms of exercises to test our skill sets.

But it's not a 'game'. Your level of focus needs to be at 100%, the entire time. We all know, and have seen the consequences, of incidents where the shooter did not have 100% focus.

 

[Hopper]

I've occasionally had to take a similar "we're done for now" stance. I came into shooting a bit late in life, and as a result, one of the best surprises is that shooting together has opened up a completely new and unexpected bond between me and my teen-aged son. He normally listens to everything I tell him, and can now often outshoot me with a rifle.

 

[Falkin88]

Have to agree you did the right thing. Whenever safety can be in doubt with firearms err on the side of caution. He'll learn to listen and come around to doing it the proper way or just continue not allowing him to handle it until he does.

 

[looney2ns]

13 years old! I feel for you dad!

You did good.

 

[PistolBob]

Pain is a good teacher. Let him smash his thumb....once is all it's going to take.

 

[rob63]

Excellent job! He will get the message and will remember it in other situations too.

I just took my 13-year old son to the range for the first time today and had the opposite experience. He sometimes acts a bit full of himself so I wasn't sure what to expect, but he was attentive and very safety conscious. They are very hard to figure at this age and I may well have your experience next time.

 

[searpinski]

Good call Dad.

 

[yeti rider]

You at least cracked the windows in the car, right? Sounds to me like you did the right thing.