INGO: Joke of the day page

[BigBoxaJunk]

When Chuck Norris pees into the wind, the wind just accepts it.

Chuck Norris wears boots to protect the ground from his feet.

 

[spencer rifle]

From my 15 year-old son:

What's the difference between Putin and Hillary?

Putin can win an election that's rigged in his favor.

 

[Thor]

 

[Doug]

From my 15 year-old son:

What's the difference between Putin and Hillary?

Putin can win an election that's rigged in his favor.

You spelled her name wrong. It's one "L" and two "I"s; Hiliary.​

 

[Thor]

I thought it was Hitlery. So many variations.

 

[femurphy77]

"I Care"-Hillary Clinton

 

[jamil]

You spelled her name wrong. It's one "L" and two "I"s; Hiliary.​

According to her website she spells it with two L's, one i. Hillary

 

[rhino]

According to her website she spells it with two L's, one i. Hillary

Everyone else spells it with a C . . . uh . . . never mind.

 

[Thor]

According to her website she spells it with two L's, one i. Hillary

So...you believe what she says?

 

[jamil]

So...you believe what she says?

It's possible that it's a vast right wing conspiracy to misspell her name.

 

[Doug]

It's possible that it's a vast right wing conspiracy to misspell her name.

 

[jamil]

Hey. Don't laugh. It's true. Russian hackers at the behest of Donald Trump, in conjunction with wiki-leaks and 4chan, hacked Hiliary's web page and misspelled her name. This is the real reason she lost. There were frog tracks all over the servers which host her website.

 

[HubertGummer]

[FONT=&quot]Recently a routine police patrol was parked outside a bar in the Outback. After last call, the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so apparently intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity, in which he tried his keys on five different vehicles, the man managed to find his car and fall into it. He sat there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off. Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off; it was a fine, dry summer night, flicked the blinkers on and off a couple of times, honked the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little, and then remained still for a few more minutes as some more of the other patrons' vehicles left. At last, when his was the only car left in the parking lot, he pulled out and drove slowly down the road. The police officer, having waited patiently all this time, now started up his patrol car, put on the flashing lights, and promptly pulled the man over and administered a breathalyser test. To his amazement, the breathalyzer indicated no evidence that the man had consumed any alcohol at all! Dumbfounded, the officer said, "I'll have to ask you to accompany me to the police station. This breathalyser equipment must be broken.""I doubt it," said the truly proud Redneck. "Tonight I'm the designated decoy."[/FONT]

 

[daddyusmaximus]

According to my new fitness smart watch... I've masturbated for 4.2 miles.

 

[patience0830]

According to my new fitness smart watch... I've masturbated for 4.2 miles.

Use the other hand. It's like dating a new girl.

 

[sharkey]

Use the other hand. It's like dating a new girl.

Or do The Stranger: sit on your watch hand until it goes to sleep, then get to work. Feels like someone else AND you still get progress towards 60 minutes/day recorded!

 

[ArcadiaGP]

Q: How do Communists win twitter arguments?
A: They seize the memes of production.

 

[actaeon277]

I'm from the government and I'm here to help.

 

[actaeon277]

It's free

 

[actaeon277]