Almost shot my brother...

[techres]

Thank you alot of this is being brought into consideration, and I'm working with familyto try and resolve this peacfully, and in a lasting way, but at this point I really just see a whole of anger and hurt coming from him. HE will probably hate me for a good while, as he has always been the victim in every situation and this will be no different. The problemn with this whole ordeal is that he doesn't understand or feel remorse for his response, He to a verbal disagrement and made it physical, hen escalated to using a deadly weapon unprovoked. Being brothers ignored, that is not an appropriate response, in any situation.

We get it, he is an ***. He is also your brother. That is a tough bind. And many, many people are in jail due to being in that bind and making a momentary bad decision that can never be unmade.

Don't put yourself in that circumstance. Just don't. If that means missing thanksgiving, so be it. If it means moving out, so be it.

You will not change him, you cannot. All you can do is decide if you are going to be there anymore.

 

[Jeremiah]

You will not change him, you cannot. All you can do is decide if you are going to be there anymore.

This has been consitently the best advice I have heard, and thanks again all of you.

 

[Zoub]

You will not change him, you cannot. All you can do is decide if you are going to be there anymore.

Put another way, only worry about what is in your control and that is you, not him.

You are at least 49% of the problem, go fix 100% of that part. If you screw up, 100% of your butt will either be in jail or live to regret it for all eternity.

Park your ego and save you and your brother by avoiding him, since shooting him does not seem to be an unacceptable scenario to you.

Take the advice you asked for but don't look for absolution in advance of a violent act, just avoid it. Every family has some dysfuntion but not every family is violent. It ain't normal Bro.

 

[Wabatuckian]

Do not be a father. Be a brother.

My brother is six years younger than me, and just as bullheaded but not with a lot of common sense. Being a teenager, I didn't know how to handle him too well. For example, he was shooting bottle rockets into the woods one year during a drought. I told him to knock it off, and after I left, he did it again. I broke the bottle rockets into. Should have just taken them.

Things like that build resentment which last into adult life.

My brother and I have reconciled. His living in Boston has helped, and when he gets back, we go camping and fishing, and drinking. He's gotten a smart mouth on him, but hey, he learned from the best..!

Last time we got in a fight, we were just slap boxing. He was losing, so he took me to the ground (I let him). Big mistake; I Ju-jitsued his butt into submission.

He tapped and we were good.

Man, when he was having girl probs, I'd take him into the woods, give him a cig, and we'd talk about it. Not exactly legal as he was a minor at the time, but we bonded. Guys do that.

I'm willing to bet you and your brother never did.

Leave the weapons at home, get some beer, some smokes, and go into the woods and talk things out. Fight if you have to - but keep weapons out of it. One of you will come out on top. It's a dominance struggle.

Hell, the Japanese recognize the need for this type of action, and let their kids fight in the school yards. It establishes a pecking order.

Josh <><

 

[Jeremiah]

Do not be a father. Be a brother.

My brother is six years younger than me, and just as bullheaded but not with a lot of common sense. Being a teenager, I didn't know how to handle him too well. For example, he was shooting bottle rockets into the woods one year during a drought. I told him to knock it off, and after I left, he did it again. I broke the bottle rockets into. Should have just taken them.

Things like that build resentment which last into adult life.
Wow that really strikes home I still have a peice of carpet remnant with a huge burn on it. My brother was messing around inside and lite a "big bottle rocket" off, the propelant light the carpet. and luckily nothing else, of course when people ask I tell them about how it happened not who did it, and all they ever say is, Matt strikes again huh?


Leave the weapons at home, get some beer, some smokes, and go into the woods and talk things out. Fight if you have to - but keep weapons out of it. One of you will come out on top. It's a dominance struggle.

I have an uncle I talked with about this event, and he touched on this too, growing up I did the least to end the confontation and blew off a lot of little stuff, never really put him in his place so to speak. My uncle seems to think I should have done that a long time ago, I just am not sure he would have got it. even now planning what I am all I see from him is lots of resentment, and no understanding.

Hell, the Japanese recognize the need for this type of action, and let their kids fight in the school yards. It establishes a pecking order.

Josh <><

thanks.

 

[tenring]

Join the military, no layoffs, paycheck every two weeks, health care included, training, away from you know who.

 

[ihateiraq]

although on the downside, people arent attacking you with asps, theyre using rockets, mortars, ieds, grenades, suicide vests, and too many other nasty little devices to name here.

 

[Agent 007]

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