Why have kids?

[rw02kr43]

The age threads got me thinking. Along with some things going on in my personal life. So, I'm asking. Why have kids? the world is so messed up. When they are born they will already owe over $200k. On night while out at dinner with my dad and a cousin who had a newborn with them, my wife thought she would corner me and asked them to tell me why having kids was the best thing ever. Dad couldn't come up with anything. Neither could the cousin. Backfire. My wife says it would be something that loves you. We have 2 dogs. They seem to like me pretty well. I guess for me the numbers just don't add up. So far I have yet to hear a good reason. Are there any?

Jason

 

[remauto1187]

The age threads got me thinking. Along with some things going on in my personal life. So, I'm asking. Why have kids? To me it seems like financial suicide. And the world is so messed up. When they are born they will already owe over $200k. On night while out at dinner with my dad and a cousin who had a newborn with them, my wife thought she would corner me and asked them to tell me why having kids was the best thing ever. Dad couldn't come up with anything. Neither could the cousin. Backfire. My wife says it would be something that loves you. We have 2 dogs. They seem to like me pretty well. I guess for me the numbers just don't add up. So far I have yet to hear a good reason. Are there any?

Jason

If you cant figure it out on your own then you may not be a proper candidate to have a kid...(your wife should have known this before she took the plunge).
It aint all about your wallet........

 

[eldirector]

Maybe for you, there is no good reason. That's fine.

Kids are not cheap, are not a good financial decision, will not give you MORE time for yourself, and can be a real strain on ALL of your relationships (spouse, parents, friends).

My daughter is the single most amazing thing that has ever happened to me. Just seeing my little girl happy is all the reward I will ever need.

Besides, if you procreate for selfish reasons, they are the wrong reasons (IMHO).

 

[ATOMonkey]

Kids bring a level of joy to your life (not happiness that's different) that is unparalleled.

It's the kind of joy you get when you're living for something greater than yourself.

The unconditional love that you give to a child and the love that is returned touches your sould in a way that is indescribable.

 

[tj_v89]

If you cant figure it out on your own then you may not be a proper candidate to have a kid...(your wife should have known this before she took the plunge).
It aint all about your wallet........

2nd that....I have one daughter and a son on the way...I dont care one bit how much my daughter costs and how much my son will cost. They are my pride, my flesh and blood. When I look at them I see love, I see my wife in my daughter and I love that. I wouldnt trade my kids for ANYTHING, and I mean that.

 

[ATOMonkey]

Also, if you want the world to get fixed, you can do it in 2 generations. That means having kids, and teaching them what is right.

If good peopel aren't having kids, then there really is not hope for the world.

You must have faith that your children will have the strength and intelligence to make the world better.

 

[NavyVet]

Because if we don't, all that will be left is them.....

 

[rw02kr43]

kids

I have been told by many people that I would make a good father. Preachers, random people and a bunch of others. I just see the deck stacked so much against our kids having any kind of future I would want them to have.

 

[PistolBob]

Some people will never be cut out for parenting, and that may be you. No big deal about it. Don't want kids? Then don't make any. Take a quick look around and you'll notice that it doesn't take a genius to make a baby. You need a license to drive but any moron can be a parent. Funny how that works.

Don't feel bad about not wanting any children.

 

[dt420]

Financially kids dont make you too much money, but you do get a tax credit on them. I try to impregnate my wife at the beginning of the year, so I get a full year of tax credit for them. There is nothing like having a kid Dec 20th and getting the whole credit for it. I usually drop them off at the fire station after taxes though, so they dont cost me anything.

lol if you are only wanting kids if it benefits your wallet, then just be honest with your wife now and tell her it will never happen.

I have a daughter and it is the greatest thing I have ever done. I disliked kids greatly before her, but now I wonder why I didnt have one sooner.

 

[lizerdking]

Every generation has had a bleak outlook. Don't let the fear of the future hold you back.

We have it better than our parents, and they had it better than theirs (My grandfather had many siblings, not many of them made it out of childhood due to disease, etc.)

Life is not about money, life is about legacy, having family and friends to cherish it with and leaving them behind when you go to spread good values and happiness.

I look at the older folks who never reproduced, sure they might drive that sports car, but how do they spend their holidays or even the days between. Money doesn't buy happiness.

Living your life to bring happiness to your children does, and hopefully some day they'll do the same.

This is my view, To each his own.

 

[HoughMade]

Good, objective financially sound reasons to have a kid? Tough to name a single one.

But, when my oldest was born and I looked at him for the first time, I felt an unconditional love that I never had before. With my parents, they were always there; I always loved them. With my wife, the love developed over time. With my son, it hit me square in the jaw, immediately, in a way that is impossible to describe to someone who has not felt it....so sorry, can't use that as a reason.

As for the state of the world- yep, lots of problems. Are you a run and hide type or do you want to do just a little bit to do something positive? Do welfare queens, meth heads, and knuckleheads hesitate to have kids? Nope. they just keep pumping them out. If level-headed, responsible people stop having kids, where will that leave the world? My kids will not always be under my care and protection. They will grow and learn and take over their own responsibilities in too few years. I trust that I will raise them to make good decisions and do their part to make their little sphere of influence a better place.

 

[Birds Away]

Being a good father is about being selfless. If what you want comes first...ever, you might not be cut our for it.

 

[rw02kr43]

kids

I guess I should have worded it better. It's not that I don't want kids. I'm worried about the world they will be born into and if I can provide for them. When I was a kid there were many times we would go to the grocery store and have a cart of food for the week or two, only to get up to the checkout and card declines or something of that sort. My parents both had full time jobs that didn't pay well. My mom died young and I feel didn't get to enjoy the last years of her life while worrying about me at college or something. I just don't want to have a kid and then not be able to provide for them. Unlike the meth heads, welfare queens etc. I am actually thinking this through.

Jason

 

[ATOMonkey]

You can't worry about the future. Who knows what the future will hold. You can make plans, but there are all sorts of unforseen tragedy that can happen.

If you plan is to work hard, live responsibly, and sacrifice for your children, then you'll be able to make it happen. Children don't need stuff to be happy, they just need to be loved and cared for.

 

[Hogwylde]

The only "good" reason to bring a child into this world is that someone has to work and pay social security taxes in order for you to have social security when you get old and start drawing it. If you do a good enough job raising your child, they might even take care of you when you are old and infirm.
But, bear this in mind too. Your child is a reflection of YOU. If your child turns out to be a criminal, drug addict, bum, LOSER...............guess what that speaks about how you raised them. You can't get around it. Your kid goes out and shoots up a gradeschool and everyone is going to blame you. Maybe you did the best you could, but you are still going to take the blame.....no matter what.

 

[Birds Away]

I guess I should have worded it better. It's not that I don't want kids. I'm worried about the world they will be born into and if I can provide for them. When I was a kid there were many times we would go to the grocery store and have a cart of food for the week or two, only to get up to the checkout and card declines or something of that sort. My parents both had full time jobs that didn't pay well. My mom died young and I feel didn't get to enjoy the last years of her life while worrying about me at college or something. I just don't want to have a kid and then not be able to provide for them. Unlike the meth heads, welfare queens etc. I am actually thinking this through.

Jason

All you can do is the best you can do. That you are worried about it is a good sign. Go forth and multiply.

 

[~Jeff~]

Children don't need stuff to be happy, they just need to be loved and cared for.

Exactly!!

And that's exactly how it is for parents who truly love their children, all that matters is that you love and take care of your children.

Nothing, NOTHING in the world can compare to the love and pride of being a parent. I do agree some people are not fit to be parents and for those that are and choose not to have children I applaud you. But I refuse to ever agree that life is better without children.

 

[miguel]

Kids aren't that expensive until they play sports, get a hobby or go to private schools.

They don't eat alot and you can dress them cheaply if you shop smartly.

 

[ATOMonkey]

Kids aren't that expensive until they play sports, get a hobby or go to private schools.

They don't eat alot and you can dress them cheaply if you shop smartly.

QFT. When they are infants, the diapers and formula can be expensive, but once they start eating table food and going on the toilet, they get much less expensive.

How much can a 30# person eat? They don't care what their clothes look like, and you will normally have a zillion people trying to give you clothes anyway.

Our problem is just getting them to wear everything once before they outgrow it.