LoneWolf -
As a parent of a child who has directly been threatened, may I offer some pointers and observations.
1) I would love to see teachers WHO CHOOSE TO be legally able to be armed. Like everyone else who carries, I believe that that they should take it seriously and not just be Johnnie Jackass with a gun on his hip.
FAR MORE IMPORTANT THAN BEING ARMED:
If you want to prevent these situations, here are some lessons that I learned:
Several of the teachers that I consider heroes from the situation we were involved in did things that made a difference. We as parents did some things that made a difference too. Here's a few things we learned.
1) Be VERY observant of the children that you teach. One of the teachers spotted some of the alarming behavior and was very concerned at the stalking and other weirdness that he was seeing IN A STUDENT THAT WAS AN HONOR STUDENT AND VERY BRIGHT. Even bright students can get out of whack.
2) Importantly - teachers on several occasions saw something AND SPOKE UP. It would have been so easy for them to have brushed off the warning signs. They spoke up. And thank God they did.
3) Importantly each one of these teachers taking action independently of each other documented the pattern that allowed the school district to take action when things got really ugly and direct threats were made on Facebook, etc. The point is - if they hadn't taken action before, it would have been MUCH harder to deal with. Because these teachers saw things clearly and didn't choose to ignore things - problems were hopefully averted.
4) Remember that while some school administrators mean well, they are so bound by idiotic rules that they are worse than worthless in these situations. In our case, things were escalating, verbal threats had happened, stalking was happening. And yet the administration didn't feel that they could discuss with the teachers the exact nature of the threats, due to privacy and other iguana concerns. That's a fact, I saw it with my own eyes. The teachers were being sent into harm's way WITHOUT being even given a clue. LESSON TO PARENTS: Assume NOTHING! We asked all of our daughters teachers to meet with us in a conference room during a break between classes. They were kind enough to do so. We quickly and in reasonable terms, laid out the issues at hand. We explained why we were concerned and the exact nature of the threats. This was BEFORE the threats escalated and student were removed from the school. We established this relationship of trust as soon as we realized that there was a problem. The teachers took this seriously, and their actions in the end averted the situation (for now) before it went "unthinkable". LESSON TO TEACHERS: Do not assume that the administration has their head on straight, not that you are being fed straight information. Many times you do not have the whole picture. When in doubt, ask questions - and ask it of the parents... The one thing that we cannot afford in these situations is for each of us to ASSUME that other knows what is going on. Those kind of Sins of Assumption are what get people killed.
5) Parents (and others) if you see a kid on Facebook or other social media spouting lyrics or ideas that sounds dangerous or self destructive or threatening - THEY ARE. Please , I beg you, take this seriously! These are cries for help. There are now a bunch of people in Ohio that are searching their soul... asking "what would have happened if I had recognized that facebook post for what it was...." Please for heaven's sake take it seriously.
There are several teachers that I will be eternally grateful to for doing exactly what I described above. by taking action and having their head on straight - the situation got turned before The Last Resort was necessary. And THAT is the ultimate hope and prayer that we all have. That by using our heads and intelligence, we never have need of the last resort that we carry.
As a parent of a child who has directly been threatened, may I offer some pointers and observations.
1) I would love to see teachers WHO CHOOSE TO be legally able to be armed. Like everyone else who carries, I believe that that they should take it seriously and not just be Johnnie Jackass with a gun on his hip.
FAR MORE IMPORTANT THAN BEING ARMED:
If you want to prevent these situations, here are some lessons that I learned:
Several of the teachers that I consider heroes from the situation we were involved in did things that made a difference. We as parents did some things that made a difference too. Here's a few things we learned.
1) Be VERY observant of the children that you teach. One of the teachers spotted some of the alarming behavior and was very concerned at the stalking and other weirdness that he was seeing IN A STUDENT THAT WAS AN HONOR STUDENT AND VERY BRIGHT. Even bright students can get out of whack.
2) Importantly - teachers on several occasions saw something AND SPOKE UP. It would have been so easy for them to have brushed off the warning signs. They spoke up. And thank God they did.
3) Importantly each one of these teachers taking action independently of each other documented the pattern that allowed the school district to take action when things got really ugly and direct threats were made on Facebook, etc. The point is - if they hadn't taken action before, it would have been MUCH harder to deal with. Because these teachers saw things clearly and didn't choose to ignore things - problems were hopefully averted.
4) Remember that while some school administrators mean well, they are so bound by idiotic rules that they are worse than worthless in these situations. In our case, things were escalating, verbal threats had happened, stalking was happening. And yet the administration didn't feel that they could discuss with the teachers the exact nature of the threats, due to privacy and other iguana concerns. That's a fact, I saw it with my own eyes. The teachers were being sent into harm's way WITHOUT being even given a clue. LESSON TO PARENTS: Assume NOTHING! We asked all of our daughters teachers to meet with us in a conference room during a break between classes. They were kind enough to do so. We quickly and in reasonable terms, laid out the issues at hand. We explained why we were concerned and the exact nature of the threats. This was BEFORE the threats escalated and student were removed from the school. We established this relationship of trust as soon as we realized that there was a problem. The teachers took this seriously, and their actions in the end averted the situation (for now) before it went "unthinkable". LESSON TO TEACHERS: Do not assume that the administration has their head on straight, not that you are being fed straight information. Many times you do not have the whole picture. When in doubt, ask questions - and ask it of the parents... The one thing that we cannot afford in these situations is for each of us to ASSUME that other knows what is going on. Those kind of Sins of Assumption are what get people killed.
5) Parents (and others) if you see a kid on Facebook or other social media spouting lyrics or ideas that sounds dangerous or self destructive or threatening - THEY ARE. Please , I beg you, take this seriously! These are cries for help. There are now a bunch of people in Ohio that are searching their soul... asking "what would have happened if I had recognized that facebook post for what it was...." Please for heaven's sake take it seriously.
There are several teachers that I will be eternally grateful to for doing exactly what I described above. by taking action and having their head on straight - the situation got turned before The Last Resort was necessary. And THAT is the ultimate hope and prayer that we all have. That by using our heads and intelligence, we never have need of the last resort that we carry.
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