Talking to my wife about carrying

[k1500]

If she doesn't want to carry a gun, then suggest a knife/mace.

Going off Robert's comedic post, it isn't too far off. While you don't need to dress up, just go with her to a parking lot of something like Walmart. Then have her stand maybe by the back of the car. Go a good 30 ft away. Then walk at a normal to brisk pace toward her and say "Hey, I want to talk to you." When you close the distance, grab her arm. Then ask her what she would have done if you were a thug. Do these scenarios in different locations. You don't need to rush her like some movie scene. She should be surprised how unprepared she is, how fast you close the distance, and how defenseless she is when you grab her arm/shoulder. In the car scenario, you can even tell her to try and get in the car having to unlock it, open the door, get in, then lock it again. Chances are even if she gets the door open or in the seat, you would be able to open the door before she locks it.

 

[Horsewing]

Defense planning. For example, start discussing a home defense strategy for when she is home alone. If X,Y, or Z happens what will be her response? From what rooms? What weapons are immediately available? Do weapons need to be strategically staged? How will she get help? What is a realistic 911 response time in your area (I believe the national average is 10-11 min)? What will she do while waiting for police? And so on. Thinking things through may help her realize that the firearm on her person is generally a lot more faster and effective than other strategically placed alternatives. Even if she is still against carrying, she has started down the road of a realistic plan to defend herself.

(I personally carry from the time I get dressed until I go to bed. I still have alternatives like knives and mace staged throughout the house, in my purse, etc. I don't rely 100% on my firearm; I rely 100% on me)

 

[dusty88]

I think many of these posts are about convincing his wife of the logical need. I don't agree with that as being much of an approach. Sure, a bit of it is OK when the opportunity comes up. But the problem with it is:
1) she'll be much more convinced if she comes to the conclusions on her own (ya know the old "convinced against their will is of the same opinion still")
2) a lot of crap can happen with a gun: negligent discharge, accidentally committing a felony by being in the wrong place and time, leaving the gun somewhere, etc. This is a big responsibility not to be pushed on someone.

What made me want to start carrying, and also made me enjoy guns a whole lot more, was getting some training. I willingly took the NRA basic pistol to feel more legal and safely prepared. That was relatively boring, and I realize now I didn't have the right gun for me at the time. I also got tired of wasting money on ammo, while I really wasn't shooting any better.

When we took the NRA home defense course, I started to get a better idea of what I was doing, picked up GREAT home defense preparation from the instructor (who was also a sheriff deputy, SWAT leader, etc), and began to realize that I needed to find a gun more appropriate for me. The instructor made some suggestions, and I went straight from class to the gun store. I started with a 0.22 target pistol to get some practice with a low-recoil gun, and also started lusting after an XDm.

After finding my gun (XDm), I enjoyed shooting a bit more but still wasn't finding holsters, purses, etc I could manage well nor was I that enthusiastic about practice. This spring, my husband and I took a 2-day pistol class in Lebanon at the sheriff's department and I learned a LOT. I realized that the money I spent improved my shooting so much that I finally understood why it was money better spent than to buy more ammo and keep shooting the same way. I have a long way to go, and I'm just getting to the point where I carry all the time. It takes trial and error to find the right holsters and also to realize that you need to keep something constantly accessible at home, preferably on your body. If the home invader shows up, it might not be while you are in your bedroom with your gun on the nightstand. It may be in the garage, while your wife is by herself unloading groceries.

If she is already concerned about home invasions, suggest the NRA home defense course. You'll learn about plans and avoidance as well as firearm use. She'll have to take the basic pistol class first, so maybe set it up as a package with the home defense course, which it sounds like she would be willing to take. Choose the instructor yourself, so you know she'll get good instruction and have a good time. If that goes well, offer another class or (if she prefers) just a 1 hr session with a local trainer, followed by some couple's range time, followed by a nice lunch out.