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    chef larry

    Grandmaster
    Rating - 100%
    1   0   0
    Apr 27, 2010
    18,710
    113
    Hobart,In
    A woman was sitting at a bar enjoying a cocktail after work one night, when the bar door opened and the most gorgeous hunk of a man she had ever seen entered. He was tall, muscular, and handsome, with thick dark hair and goatee, beautiful, sparkling brown eyes, and his every movement was so masculine and sensuous that the woman could not help but stare.

    The man noticed that he was the object of the woman's rapt attention, and with a sly, sexy smile, approached her. Blushing, she prepared to apologize for staring, but he leaned close and whispered in her ear.

    "I'll do anything," he whispered in a deep, soft voice. "Anything, absolutely anything you want, anything you have ever fantasized, for fifty dollars. There's just one condition..."

    Trembling with anticipation, the woman asked him the condition. The man said, "You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words."

    The woman gazed into his hypnotic eyes, considering the proposition, then reached into her handbag and took out fifty dollars. She scribbled her address on a napkin, folded it around the cash, and pressed it into his waiting hand.

    She leaned over and whispered into his ear... "Clean... my... house."
     

    HandK

    Grandmaster
    Emeritus
    Rating - 100%
    11   0   0
    Mar 14, 2009
    51,606
    38
    Way Up North!!
    I'm In!!! pick me!!! pick me!!!

    128693770820618009.jpg
     

    figley

    Expert
    Rating - 94.7%
    18   1   0
    Jun 18, 2009
    1,036
    38
    SW Indy
    The other day, I was at the store with my ol' lady. She led my by the ladies undies section, and I saw one brand that boldly advertised, "NO RIDE-UP GUARANTEE". I guess that's important to ladies too, as I know I like my shorts to stay where they're supposed to, and not go where they're not supposed to.

    But, a GUARANTEE? Money back? How could you lose? I thought I just may have to switch the brand of my unmentionables.

    Then I wondered, how would I make a claim against that warranty? Would I have to take a picture of them in the act of riding up? Would I have to remit the actual drawers themselves, including the evidence that they had, in fact, ridden up? And to whom would I plead my case? I can't see missing work, and travel expenses, just to visit the manufacturer. And I surely wouldn't trust such things to the US Mail. Would I have to air my "dirty laundry", so to speak, in the semi-public forum of the Wal-Mart customer service center?

    All this worrying gave me a rash of the hives. I believe I'll stick to drawers for fellers. Yes, they do ride up from time to time, but I knew they'd do that when I bought 'em.
     

    slimplmbr

    Expert
    Rating - 100%
    29   0   0
    Jan 27, 2010
    1,161
    38
    Greenfield
    Come on! Daddy needs a reason to get another fine Smith and Wesson pistol!!


    Joke:
    Horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face.

    Lame but a classic!
     
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