Anyone else here hate "Hot Pocket Roulette"?

[MohawkSlim]

There was a time, long, long ago, before the rotating plate, when Hot Pockets were the stuff of legends. How long did you cook? How much "turn" did it need? How long did you let it cool before it was perfect?

Nowadays you just get an evenly-heated pseudo-burrito of fake-food deliciousness. Who wants that?

 

[JettaKnight]

OK since we've gone nostalgic and talking about things that pretend to be food in convenient forms, anyone every eat the chili dog burritos by Marquez? Yup, a chili dog in a burrito. The hot dog was "meat", but the chili was textured vegetable protein - I still regret the day I read the ingredients on the label.

Much like a hot pocket, the hotdog was either cold and slimey or magma-hot and shriveled. I was working on a formula for the perfect microwave setting that would get the hotdog just right, but it was really complex - cooking time, position in microwave, freezer temperature, incoming line voltage, atmospheric humidity and pressure, lunar cycle, number of people standing in the kitchen watching the microwave, the price of gasoline at the station down the street...


Check your freezers, I'll buy any found lurking in there.

 

[printcraft]

[video=youtube;kSDYizrQQQ8]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kSDYizrQQQ8[/video]


Hot Delicious Rotten Meat. Oozing with flavor.

 

[KG1]

[video=youtube;kSDYizrQQQ8]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kSDYizrQQQ8[/video]


Hot Delicious Rotten Meat. Oozing with flavor.

Is this a "Denny"?

 

[cbhausen]

Okay folks, don't blame me if you look up "Alabama hot pocket" in the Urban Dictionary... Just sayin'.

Look at your own risk.

Sorry, this thread reminded me of that.

 

[hoosierdoc]

I cooked it and ated it up. Pepperoni. Mm....

And yes, I burned my hard palate

 

[Cameramonkey]

I cooked it and ated it up. Pepperoni. Mm....

And yes, I burned my hard palate

Better go see a doctor about that.

 

[printcraft]

I cooked it and ated it up. Pepperoni. Mm....

And yes, I burned my hard palate

Eat a bowl of Cpt. Crunch, it'll help.

 

[Mark-DuCo]

Eat a bowl of Cpt. Crunch, it'll help.

I swear they have made that stuff harder than it was when I was a kid. I swear the roof of my mouth is almost bleeding by the time I finish a bowl now.

 

[Cameramonkey]

I swear they have made that stuff harder than it was when I was a kid. I swear the roof of my mouth is almost bleeding by the time I finish a bowl now.

I blame Clark Griswold and his non-nutritive food varnish. (Yes, I have watched that movie WAY too many times)

 

[JettaKnight]

Eat a bowl of Cpt. Crunch, it'll help.

Point of order - there's no T in the name.

Stolen valor or something...

 

[printcraft]

Point of order - there's no T in the name.

Stolen valor or something...

You just talked yourself down to soy milk.

 

[JettaKnight]

You just talked yourself down to soy milk.

 

[RevoWood123]

Especially the limited edition spicy taco ones. Alas, they no longer make them. I has a sad.

Yes, the spicy taco, was the best pizza roll ever. Before that it was the cheesy nacho. Either way, I has a sad as well.

 

[17 squirrel]

This afternoon I did a scan & clean of the freezer, I found a lost sausage egg and cheese crescent breakfast sammi. It had more ice crystals in the cellophane than on the outside.
I let it warm up and I unwrapped it and dropped it in the dog bowl, you know the drill, nails on the floor tail wagging and a happy face rolls around the corner.
He sniffed it, picked it up and looked up at me with a discussed look and dropped it back in the bowl and headed back over to sleep next to the wood stove..
Ungrateful dog... I guess he's figured me out, if the husky guy doesn't eat it, there must be a reason..