You may live in Indiana (humor)

[Pami]

Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about Hoosiers...

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May, you may live in Indiana

If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you may live in Indiana

If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Indiana


If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, youmay live in Indiana


If 'Vacation' means going anywhere south of Muncie for the weekend, you may live in Indiana


If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Indiana


If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Indiana


If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C' in the same day and back again, you may live in Indiana


If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you may live in Indiana


If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Indiana


If you carry jumpers in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Indiana


If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you may live in Indiana


If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph -- you're going 80 and everybody is passing you, you may live in Indiana


If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you may live in Indiana


If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction, you may live in Indiana


If you have more miles on your snow blower than your car, you may live in Indiana


If you find 10 degrees 'a little chilly', you may live in Indiana


If you actually understand these jokes, and forward them to all your Indiana friends & others, you definitely live in Indiana


Sounds like the Hoosiers are very nice people

 

[TomN]

I think I live in Indiana.

 

[epsylum]

If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you may live in Indiana

This I have to disagree with. Most IN drivers act like it is the first time they have seen snow in their whole lives. I have been behind people going 5 - 10 mph with only a couple inches on the ground. My dad is from NY state and I have been their during snow storms. Now they know how to drive in the snow. Plus they have those things called "hills" there to deal with as well.

There are some things on there that are quite true though (the speeding and pot hole things mostly). As for the seasons I would make it "rain, snow, more rain, potholes". We only have about 2-3 nice months (june, july, august) and it does nothing but rain in the spring and fall.

 

[strongcrow]

Coming from a "Not an Indiana Native" -- if you feel that June, July, and August -- which are usually 95 degrees or so and 100% humidity as NICE, I feel for you. I spent 15 years living around the San Francisco Bay, where the natural fog kept the temps in the 60-70 range most of the year, man Indiana summers are about as brutal as the winters. Don't get me wrong I am now a "Hoosier" and suffer through the summer, But the winters aren't as bad as when I first got here. But I agree with the "I've never driven in the snow before!!!! What do I do ????? It's the same as when it rains. OH Crap, how do I drive now.

 

[epsylum]

Coming from a "Not an Indiana Native" -- if you feel that June, July, and August -- which are usually 95 degrees or so and 100% humidity as NICE, I feel for you. I spent 15 years living around the San Francisco Bay, where the natural fog kept the temps in the 60-70 range most of the year, man Indiana summers are about as brutal as the winters. Don't get me wrong I am now a "Hoosier" and suffer through the summer, But the winters aren't as bad as when I first got here. But I agree with the "I've never driven in the snow before!!!! What do I do ????? It's the same as when it rains. OH Crap, how do I drive now.

<--- Lived in TN and AR. So yeah, IN summers aren't that bad.

 

[Hiram2005]

Driving 75..

Driving 75 in a blizzard shows a native Hoosier....these ones who drive like they never saw snow are transplants to Indiana. More of these now than natives I think!

 

[Pami]

Driving 75 in a blizzard shows a native Hoosier....these ones who drive like they never saw snow are transplants to Indiana. More of these now than natives I think!

Nod nod... that one made me wonder if this was actually written for Wisconsin or Minnesota and "changed" somewhere in its history, but most of the others were spot on...

I have to agree with Hiram2005... there's a lot more transplants these days (two of my neighbors are from California!).

 

[Lars]

75 through two feet of snow, in a blizzard......
Amateurs!

Real men do 90, with one hand on the wheel, another drinking hot chocolate, with the roof down.

 

[epsylum]

<--- IN transplant that is not afraid of driving in snow (my Subie's AWD helps a lot, but even my RWD and FWD cars I had more grins on my face than frowns).

 

[Lars]

Me too Epsylum, I grew up in Wisconsin. We might know a thing or two about snow, and how to drive in it

Subi helps also I suppose

 

[Jeff]

Coming from a "Not an Indiana Native" -- if you feel that June, July, and August -- which are usually 95 degrees or so and 100% humidity as NICE, I feel for you.

Having spent a a few summers in Texas, Florida and Saudi Arabia, it just doesn't get any better than that.

 

[Jay]

... and ... if you have a LIFETIME license to carry, you can ONLY live in Indiana.

 

[Pami]

... and ... if you have a LIFETIME license to carry, you can ONLY live in Indiana.

 

[munky_3434]

If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you may live in Indiana

i usually do that while driving with my knee