talking to kids about this tragedy.

[jjordan2840]

I have a 7 year-old and a 10 year old. Anyone have any suggestions as to what to say to help ease their mind. My daughter was a the doctors office today and saw it on tv. Now, she doesn't want to go back to school. She is afraid. Their classrooms don't have doors on them, she doesn't feel like there will be any protection for them. I'm at a loss. How do you tell your kids that they are never really safe? There is evil everywhere. Its hard being a parent at times like this.

 

[THard6]

that's a great question. i can totally understand seeing a small child in fear of this taking place at his or her school. but i don't know if telling them all details is a good thing to do. make sure she understands this is not an every day thing that is taking place, make sure she knows daddy has a gun for her protection and that you will be there for her! also make sure to point out the number of police that are around to help look out for her. but at the same time you need to tell her what to do in a situation, if she feels like something bad is taking place tell her to find a closet or something in her classroom as a "go to place" and or have a phone near that she is able to dial 911 (if she's 7 i'm sure you've told her about 911) but other than that i don't know what to tell you. i hope this helps.. just comfort her and help her cope with the fear..

 

[jjordan2840]

that's a great question. i can totally understand seeing a small child in fear of this taking place at his or her school. but i don't know if telling them all details is a good thing to do. make sure she understands this is not an every day thing that is taking place, make sure she knows daddy has a gun for her protection and that you will be there for her! also make sure to point out the number of police that are around to help look out for her. but at the same time you need to tell her what to do in a situation, if she feels like something bad is taking place tell her to find a closet or something in her classroom as a "go to place" and or have a phone near that she is able to dial 911 (if she's 7 i'm sure you've told her about 911) but other than that i don't know what to tell you. i hope this helps.. just comfort her and help her cope with the fear..

she is 10, my boy is 7. I'm a firefighter so they have had 911 embedded in them from a young age. She is active in 4h shooting sports, so she knows I am armed and she can arm herself at home. It just brings me to tears, knowing I can't always be there to keep them safe. My son was still at school, so hopefully he hasn't heard about it, so we can be the ones to try to explain it. I will definitely share the safe place suggestion. My wife will be bringing them by the station tonight so I can try to help them make sense of it.

 

[THard6]

Thank you for your service!
i wish you the best of luck with them, however keep us posted on what you tell them and what they tell you! kids are awesome.. and there is nothing better than the love between a parents love to their children!

 

[88GT]

she is 10, my boy is 7. I'm a firefighter so they have had 911 embedded in them from a young age. She is active in 4h shooting sports, so she knows I am armed and she can arm herself at home. It just brings me to tears, knowing I can't always be there to keep them safe. My son was still at school, so hopefully he hasn't heard about it, so we can be the ones to try to explain it. I will definitely share the safe place suggestion. My wife will be bringing them by the station tonight so I can try to help them make sense of it.

You can't. It's a senseless act.

Your child's fears are real and, even worse, substantiated. Though if she's mature enough to understand risk, you might try that tack. The bigger problem I see is that you can't make it better for them without telling them that it won't happen. But how can you say that without running the risk of being made a liar by some jackwagon with an axe to grind? Emphasize the security measures the school has (while trying to avoid the fact that the CT school probably had similar ones). I don't envy parents with children in schools.

My generic response to things like this is simply that bad people do bad things and hurt others for no reason other than they (bad people) wanted to cause pain and suffering. My oldest is only 6 so that's about as deep as he can understand at this point. But we also homeschool so he has no reason to project what happens at brick-and-mortar schools with what might happen to him. At 6, I'm not sure he's got the mental capacity yet to project anything he sees on the news (which is extremely limited anyway) as a possible occurrence for him anyway. But when it does happen, I'm hoping that our matter-of-fact approach to life's risks at this age will help him process it a little less personally.

 

[Ricnzak]

I have a 7 year-old and a 10 year old. Anyone have any suggestions as to what to say to help ease their mind. My daughter was a the doctors office today and saw it on tv. Now, she doesn't want to go back to school. She is afraid. Their classrooms don't have doors on them, she doesn't feel like there will be any protection for them. I'm at a loss. How do you tell your kids that they are never really safe? There is evil everywhere. Its hard being a parent at times like this.

Really!

 

[Classic]

My daughter is 13. I picked her up from school this afternoon. I was wondering how she would take it as she works with kindergarten kids when she is done with her lessons. I said "something terrible happened today". She said "I know, it was all over Instagram - there were all kinds of memorials for the children. Obama wants to take our guns away because of this retard."

 

[SSGSAD]

My daughter is 13. I picked her up from school this afternoon. I was wondering how she would take it as she works with kindergarten kids when she is done with her lessons. I said "something terrible happened today". She said "I know, it was all over Instagram - there were all kinds of memorials for the children. Obama wants to take our guns away because of this retard."

YOU, Sir, have a VERY BRIGHT daughter !!!!! Keep up the GOOD WORK !!!!!

 

[churchmouse]

My "Kids" are all in their mid 20's and up. I have been talking to my Grand-daughter tonight about the world.
You are correct...It is tough to explain and be understood. As 88Gt stated... senseless act that can not be rationally explained. You can not get to deep with this.
Teach then situational awareness but do not over sell it at their age. Duck...cover and those tactics.

 

[lester]

We have so far shielded our kindergartener. Not sure what or how to tell him about evil people in the world.

I use this opportunity to remind my other son, the teenager, that we always use our own lives to stand up for good people who are hurt by the bad ones. This was a good chance to teach him about Sir Edmund Burke.

 

[RobbyMaQ]

I told my 10 yr old son about, we talked a while. I told him I worried that no guns are allowed on school property, so no one can really defend against such an act. Running and hiding is all he can do in that situation. We discussed finding good hiding spots, and trying to find a way out.

 

[Benny]

I have a first grader and have been changing the channel when he comes into the room while I'm watching the coverage.

I'm not bringing up to him until he brings it up to me. I don't see a need in unnecessarily scaring him about going to school until (if) he hears about it and asks me.

I'm probably starting to sound like a broken record, but I really can't express enough how heartbroken I am about this. I want to cry every time I think about it.

20 kids.

 

[churchmouse]

I have a first grader and have been changing the channel when he comes into the room while I'm watching the coverage.

I'm not bringing up to him until he brings it up to me. I don't see a need in unnecessarily scaring him about going to school until (if) he hears about it and asks me.

I'm probably starting to sound like a broken record, but I really can't express enough how heartbroken I am about this. I want to cry every time I think about it.

20 kids.

Me too. been tearing up all night. I just can not even begin to imaging the depth of sorrow. This is beyond comprehension by any sane individual.

 

[MrsXtremeVel]

We do regular lock down drills at the elementary school I work at. They know to go to the designated spot in the classroom, remain quiet and listen to directions from staff. However, we had a situation last week when I had 65 kids on the playground for recess and a local bank was robbed. The perp was on foot. It took less than 2 minutes to round the kids up and get them in the building. The property our school sits on has a wooded area behind it and I'm always vigilant about strangers walking thru there. I just can't wrap my head around anyone wanting to harm a child. It breaks my heart.